Forever Mommy

Yes I am back!!

2011-03-24T00:23:00.000-04:00

So, I have not abandoned this blog of mine, but yea, I have to admit – its been way TOO long since I posted anything in here. I miss not having the time to capture my “little darlings’” cute little things in here to share with you all my friends and family but it just has been crazy 6 months. Too much going on.

My brother, his wife, my sis, dad, and us

We had an amazing fall with my dad visiting us; kids had much fun with papa who totally and completely spoiled them with everything. Gauri still seems to be her nanu’s ABSOLUTE favorite and even one "crocodile-tear" from her and nanu’s (Grandpa/ Papa) goes melting like “soft-serve-left-in-sun” – well what I really mean is Papa just cant bear to see her cry even if her demand is not right. But Neel has had it share of fun with Nanu, with him being so super cute and super naughty, nanu has not been able to resist his charms. Papa would swing him on his legs for hours even though his back would hurt; when Neel would ask to be picked up not wanting to walk, guess who does he turn to? Nanu of course and although Nanu’s back hurts like hell, he would still pick him up every time. So I can easily put the blame of spoiling my kids on – dear Nanu.

Neel being Neel, His eyes tell it all

Gauri's true spirit is captured in this - My Fav.

From my absolute favorite photographer - my brother

We all took our first ever family vacation this winter to Vegas and Grand Canyon. It was absolutely fun and relaxing. Kids had a complete blast too. The Grand Canyons were breath-taking and although it snowed there all the time that we were at the Canyons, but still Amazing.

I had one of my longtime wish list items taken care of – to watch Phantom of the Opera , and boy it was absolutely mind-blowing, stunning, amazing. I am so glad we did it, it was so nice of Papa and my brother and his wife to take care of the kids while we went out just the two of us to watch this Broadway show.

Kids had so much fun in the huge Jacuzzi we had in our suite at MGM – its funny what simple things give them such immense pleasure.

Gauri and Neel had fun Birthdays. Gauri had a party with her special friends at the Bowling alley this time. All the kids had a blast especially with the Kiddie bowling lanes, Neon lights and laser show. On the actual day of her Birthday, daddy took a day-off from work specially for her and we spent the whole day with both kids. We spent the day at the Mystic Aquarium and while Neel loved the Begula Whale Gauri just wanted to take the Penguins home (and I just wanted to be locked with the Jelly fishes ). Oh and Gauri also got two of her top list items from Mama (uncle), Mami, Mimi and Nanu – her first Bicycle and a Scooter – She was toooo happy.

For Neel’s birthday we had a nice relaxing time as a family, giving our 100% attention and time to our little monkey because we figured he doesn’t really like big crowds of people yet. Lots of presents and one yummy cake that Neel put his entire face in because he just couldn’t wait to eat the frosting off of it.

Overall we had a fun and very busy Fall and Winter. The New Year stared with lots of new goals (not resolutions) one of which was for me to go back to work. And I have to say that I was fortunate enough to land on a really wonderful opportunity in about 10 days of looking for work. More about job and changes we have had since in next post.

Memoirs of a beautiful summer

2010-10-31T22:19:00.000-04:00

Oh what a beautiful, eventful summer we had this year - filled with Tons of activities, amazing time together, new things discovered, old traditions re-lived, cooking, playing, meeting friends/ family and just about everything to call it a memorable summer.

Both Kids, attended a summer reading program at out local library in Groton. While Gauri loves books and making new friends during the story time, Neel just likes to do puzzles or just knock some books down the shelves.

Gauri and Neel listening to a story with arms around each other

Not too bad at puzzles

Gauri love of reading finds her reading even at a Gap store :)

We were so lucky to meet a Kid's celebrity - Steve from Steve Songs on PBS. Gauri Absolutely loves his silly songs in the morning and you can catch her humming those throughout the day. She was sumer excited to meet Steve in person and to dance to his singing.

This year was the performance year at Gauri’s Ballet school, at at only 3.5 half years Gauri had her first stage performance. Oh Boy did she ever look cuter? It was an amazing experience for both Gauri and me, while on one hand it was very hectic for both of us attending the innumerable practice sessions (specially along with Neel in the waiting area or Audience) and Gauri did get a stage fright or what she called “afraid of the backstage Dark”,she screamed and cried and refused to go on stage during the Dress rehearsal, but Thanks to God she did finally went on the stage on the final day of performance. I was crying the whole time when was dancing and Neel was yelling “geggey” clapping and jumping with excitement.

Both Kids started swimming this summer and had great fun. Gauri decided to continue learning this fall and is doing so well. Finally, our little mermaid is showing the same passion for water as her dad. She is always on step ahead of her instructor and swims like a fish.

This year we also did some fruit picking, from strawberries, to blueberries to Peaches, Apples and now pumpkins. We picked them all and enjoyed eating them too. This was such fun and kids absolutely loved it.

Gauri attended the Sunshine Camp - a summer camp program from Groton and she had a blast there. She made two very wonderful friends there Alyssa and Sydney who continues to be her really close friends now specially after her losing her dear friend Shealyn to her dad’s work transfer. Summer camp was such a hit - the kids were hugging each other and crying on the last day.

We also visited the Seaport museum and Kids museum in mystic several times this year. The three of us love the Horse-carriage ride there and to dress up like sailor and pirates :)

Neel not only stacks blocks, but just about anything.

Neel is turning out to be so funny, absolute goof ball, sneaky and mischievous and somewhat destructive too. He walks with his both arms spread out so he can grab something and throw it as he walks. Climbing up, all the way to the top of the fridge by stacking things, and making tall “block” towers is his favorite hobby. He also "loves" to help mum in the kitchen - now that's another story how much help I need cleaning up after he has helped me in the kitchen.

Making big messes with colors and latest with flour (at his uncle’s house) yet other favorites of Neel.

Over all we had an amazing summer and with festivals staring, and naanu (My dad) visiting us, we are happily moving on to a colorful fall.

A New Chapter

2010-09-04T23:11:00.002-04:00

Happy Feet (and Happy Face too)

I can either say ‘Another chapter closed” or “A New chapter begins....” just depends on how I feel about our darling little daughter, the baby we “just” brought home from the hospital, flap her wings to fly into open air, a little further away from us, a little bit on her own, making new friendships, learning new things, moving out from just our company to the company of kids her age and ALL-READY for pre-school.

Gauri started pre-school and we are very proud of her. But it breaks my heart to see her go, holding hands of her teacher and her friend, excited to start a new chapter in her life, not looking back even once... I am so happy she is taking this transition so well. She sounds happy, excited and completely relaxed about pre-school. Fortunately, her friend from summer camp “Sydney” is in the same class as her, and that makes it bit more easy for her to adjust in this new environment.

Good luck my "sweet pea"; do your very best and may Fame and Success be yours!

Gauri’s First School: Charles Barnum in Groton

School Program: Peer role model

Gauri’s First Teacher: Mrs. Amy Nixon

Gauri’s First Day at school: Sept 2nd 2010

Papa's Day

2010-08-30T22:49:00.000-04:00

You never look for praises, You are never the one to boast

You just go on working quietly, For those you love the most.

Your dreams are seldom spoken, Your wants are very few

And most of the time your worries, Will go unspoken too.

You are there like a firm foundation, Through all our storms of life

A sturdy hand to hold to, In times of stress and strife.

A true friend we can turn to, When no one else would bother

One of God's greatest blessings, Is to have you as our Father.

Happy Birthday Our Dearest Papa.

Damn Dehydration

2010-07-26T12:31:00.000-04:00

After having an wonderful 4th of July weekend in Boston with so many of our cousins and uncles and aunts and after finally uniting with Mani (he got back from Germany after 14 days that same weekend), eating tons of wonderful food - courtesy Gita taiji and Arvind tauji, laughing till our bellies would hurt, singing and dancing, after all this, we had a terrible start of the week with Gauri suddenly throwing up at 10 PM Monday night. She continued to vomit all night, literally every 5 - 10 minutes, unable to hold even a spoonful of water, barely able to walk to the wash room, super sleepy yet unable to sleep because of the nausea. We waited till the morning but since she was looking dehydrated by 8 AM we saw her pediatrician who gave her some med for stopping her vomiting. The meds did work and by wednesday morning she only threw up once. We were so relieved but relief lasted only a couple of hours - While trying to sleep Neel wednesday night he had the similar throw up like Gauri. Oh God my worst nightmare had come true. The Doctor had warned us that the virus was severely infectious and we ALL might come down with it. Neel had the same throwing up episode as Gauri - 5 - 10 minute interval just that he seems out of it very quickly. After about 4 hours of throwing up he lay limp - not able to move, no tears - crying constantly in a very low volume because of nausea but unable to actually vomit anything any longer - completely dehydrated, too sleepy and lethargic. At about 2 AM we were begging the doctor to prescribe Neel the same med (Zofran that they gave to Gauri - but th answer was “NO” - “can never to such a mall baby, its not fit for even Gauri, not sure why the other dr. did prescribe it for Gauri”.

I immediately did some research only to find out that its mostly given to patients with nausea caused by Chemo, not safe for small kids.

We passed the night somehow - morning saw the Dr., and his opinion was to take him to the hospital for IV. I chose to keep him home and try some electrolytes but he want able to hold anything. I dreaded taking him to the hospital but finally we had to. He was so dehydrated by friday that it was the "Doctors ORDERS" this time.

After falling asleep finally

Gauri was quite freaked out when we took him to the hospital and when all the nurses were trying to prick my poor baby several times to draw some blood and for the IV needle. Thanks to our friends Anurag and Malvi who came to the hospital and took Gauri with them. Neel was terrible after so many people trying to get the needle in him and so much commotion...he finally slept at 11 PM and I sat besides him all night to change him if he threw up again.

Neel after 2 days of IV sugar in him

Gauri stayed home with baba but visited Neel every day while he was still there. We even watched some fireworks on the Thames from our hospital window and Gauri sang songs for Neel and even played with him while we tried hard to keep him from pulling out the IV needles from his hand. By morning and with enough IV fluid in him, he was looking better although he only had his first bite of food sunday afternoon then was finally discharged.

We were so relieved as all 4 of us drove back home from the hospital with our both babies finally Healthy and Happy. Oh what a week!!

What's a Bulkhead?

2010-06-25T01:28:00.004-04:00

When we moved to our current house in CT I asked this question and the answer was:

Its a door for outside access to the basement for getting bulky/dirty things in/out of the basement without going through the formal first floor areas of the house

We had never used it and it had always been a Dark, Dirty, Spider-web-filled, ugly looking slant door in the backyard, that our kids would often use for jumping on or as a slide at-times.

But today, I discovered a NEW use for this un-explored door.

"For getting out of your basement when Neel locks you in the basement and cries nonstop for half hour and does not know how to unlock."

Tonight, when I was in the basement getting the folded Laundry upstairs, Gauri came downstairs and closed the basement door so Neel wouldn’t climb down too. Soon Neel started crying and I climbed up to open the door for him, only to find that it had been locked from outside. Holy Sh... - what am I going to do now? Cellphone - Damn I dont have any of my neighbours' numbers in it, I just got a new phone after losing one in trash (again thanks to Mr. Neel) so my contact list was - GONE. Half nervous and half frightened, with two screaming babies in the background I remembered “The BulkHead”.

After struggling hard with the darkness inside it, the cobwebs and the badly rusted door latch that became almost impossible to open, I was finally out. I rushed to the back door on the patio, again to find that it was locked from inside too. I immediately ran to the front door almost thinking that if that’s also locked I am going to break the window and JUST GET IN. Poor Neel had turned all red and blue from crying and being alone. Thanks to Krishna, the front door was unlocked.

We then had a BIG group hug - all three of us.

On another note - today wasn’t all that crappy after all; we actually had loads of fun in the afternoon in our new water pool. These pictures will speak for themselves.

Neel and Gauri after the water play.

Thank You Bulkhead - you saved us today :)

A Strong guy with heart soft as butter - we call him Dad

2010-06-22T23:06:00.002-04:00

Happy Father’s Day (Belated) to my dad, my husband and all other amazing dads we know. You are pillars of our family and no matter how many times we forget to acknowledge your kid deeds, your love for us and for our kids, you support and strength at times of hardships is much appreciated; we want you to know, your efforts do not go un-noticed.

I am missing you Papa, wish we were closer, to everyday learn from you - new things and to hear the unlimited wisdom about life and the how to appreciate every one and everything we have been given by God. We miss you lots.

The three of us are craving to spend yet another evening with you my Darling husband, how can I tell you how much we are missing you right now, every day and as we strike off the dates on our calendar in the evening, Gauri loves to count how many days left before we will pick you from the airport. Two weeks seems like FOREVER. Come home soon.

Hugs and Kisses

The Lonely Three

Summer Starts with Strawberry Picking

2010-06-04T23:52:00.001-04:00

Call it Pick-your-own, PYO or you-pick, the idea of picking your own fruit and vegetables is absolutely fantastic, specially for young kids (and adults as well, when you are picking mouth-watering-red-oozing-with-juice strawberries).

With the season fast approaching, I was having a craving to go strawberry picking for past few days. The store bought strawberries are “trash-able” compared to the local-grown; I, anyway hate the idea of cold-storage and transporting fruits across the country. Its the worst thing you can do to your fruits. I love local and therefore wait for the summer.

This morning Neel, Gauri and I headed off to Scott Yankee’s Farm near our place to explore the idea of PYO with kids. I wasn’t sure if Neel would like it since he doesn't seem very comfortable with grass etc. I think its just the feeling of greens on bare foot that doesn't appeal the young kids, Gauri was exactly the same way but soon converted into a gardner of er own kind :) I am sure Neel’s on the same path too.

Anyway, the kids had a blast at the farm, despite the scorching heat outside (89 F) both didn't want to leave the farm. After tasting several strawberries and finally discovering that the small red ones were the juiciest, my smarty-pants Ms. G was busy looking for perfect strawberries to put in her container,

and Neel was just exploring the BIG open farm - with no worries of where Mom was, he would just walk away real far from us with his fuzzy friend Jojo (the monkey on his back), get down occasionally and squish some red temptation in his tiny mouth; I almost caught him red-handed several times.

(sorry Image too small, click on it to enlarge)

I had to drag them back to the farm stand to pay and head back home. By this time, our faces and clothes were somewhat red with sun and all the strawberries we “tasted”, we had lots of fruit to bring back home for us and friends to share with.

Gauri said on our way back “mumma, why do we buy strawberries from Grocery store, we should always get our own”!! What a great experience and learning for kids.

Thanks to whoever came up with the idea of pick your own. We will surely be going back for more strawberries and Blueberries, Raspberries and Apples too when the season starts.

Sweet Love

2010-05-16T23:36:00.000-04:00

Oh goodness, I have been thinking of writing about all that has been going on in our life but I just dont seem to find ANY time these days. Its just that crazy right now. I wonder how you working moms (and of course my mom when we were little too) are able to find time for your “jobs” - I am almost amazed by those working moms of two or more little ones.

Anyway, although we have been SUPER DUPER SMUPER busy but I have never enjoyed life this much ever. Gauri and Neel both are such adorable and so cute and so mischievous and so funny that they just make my day by their silly acts.

Neel love Gauri like crazy - though they fight at times over toys etc but if I ever scold Gauri for anything - he will immediately some shushing me....I am serious that tiny person will place one hand on his back, bend somewhat and Shush me with his one TINY finger on his lips :) ... I just burst into laughter at this.

One tear from Gauri’s eyes and you will see Neel walking to her with a towel of some sort to wipe her tears followed by a BIG hug around her legs - so cute. I hope and wish that their love continues to grow like this and when they are both teenagers and they almost hate each other, may be they can read this and realize how much they loved each other.

Gauri apart from being very sensible, very vocal and expressive, very sensitive to other kids’s feelings is also SUPER SOCIAL. Like today, she was standing outside mer mama’s(uncle) house and calling out this -

“people come inside my mom has made something very yummy to eat, come, come in”

She is super extrovert and LOVES LOVES LOVES being around other people no matter what age. She reminded me of her DIWAKAR mama who, my aunt tells us did exactly the same when he was a 3 year old.... I thought that was funny.

So life’s crazy right now but fun too, I am so glad I took this time off from work and choose to stay home with the kids. I would have missed so much if I didn’t.

Hope you all are enjoying the summer - we are.

Some days, parenting is… HARD

2010-04-13T19:15:00.002-04:00

That was my exhausted thought as I was doing multitasking in my kitchen at the end of the day today. Between trying to check emails, making a list of pending phone calls, expanding my never-ending to-do-list where it feels like nothing ever gets accomplished, preparing dinner for kids and us, cleaning up the living room which looked like a jungle of toys, thinking about how to juggle in Swim classes for the kids…..I was feeling like “I just cant accomplish anything EVER!!”

The whole day had been a battle.

I can’t even remember as I write this what the issues were, but it just seemed like everything was a challenge today.

Maybe it was because I had planned to do many things today but couldn’t get much done from my list of things;

Or maybe it was because Gauri is almost 3.5 and she’s becoming more independent and more verbal.

My every effort to try to teach her to write, color-within-the-lines, remember her numbers/ alphabets etc are all only making her more rigid.

Neel’s also getting quite independent and doing the boy things – break stuff, getting into things he shouldn't, pull away Gauri’s toys and most specially her Dolls, and therefore fights between the two ALL-THE-TIME!!

Whatever the reason, I was frustrated this evening and I almost felt like a TOTAL FAILURE at parenting and house-keeping. I have really NEVER felt this way for anything. I have always been a go-getter, on top of everything, leading not following or merely trying to catch up…. But I broke down this evening into tears when I looked around me and all I saw was a mountain of work, Neel Gauri fighting over a doll, Gauri not stopping from putting her hair in her mouth despite of me asking her several times and Neel trying to run away with poop on his bottoms!!

Gosh – I felt SO down and sad and depressed, all I asked for from my hubby

“can I get just 24 hours to myself to be 24 again”

as our 10^th wedding anniversary gift.

There is always so much pressure on moms, to teach their kids every possible skill in the world, to take them to million lessons, make sure they are achieving all milestones appropriate for their age and making them smarter, and obedient, and happy and disciplined; cooking the most nutritious meals for the whole family that also taste good and is not boring and repeating, keeping the house like NO-KIDS live in it – how do we do all that and also look good and sound happy at the end of the day when hubby descends from work?

Is it just be who doesn’t know how to make all this work effortlessly or do any of you moms feel the same way?

Well I know I am going to give my kids a nice warm bath and cuddle them in bed to bounce out of it for now!!

Valentines 2010

2010-03-05T16:35:00.002-05:00

I know I am lagging behind in updating the blog and we are almost a month late in posting about our valentines day fun, but, I don’t want to NOT write about it at all because it was just too cute and a whole lot fun.

The week before V’ day baba was out on a business trip and we were supposed to have a snow storm – not ideal situation when hubby’s not around and kids have dr’s appointments, we have a flat tire and not of snow to shovel. But we were too excited for V’day to keep us from having fun.

So while it was snowing heavily outside (picture below)

All 3 of us were busy making valentines cookies and Gauri wanted to make a Valentines necklace for herself and her Baba. (Look at her creativity below, I am not going to steal the thunder here because really the cookie decoration and the fruit loops was all her idea)

Baba came home the night before V’day and as he reached Gauri’s Crib to kiss her on coming back, she immediately woke up and hugged him and whispered in his ears “Baba I made a valentine’s surprise necklace for you…sh…..Neel’ will wake up so I’ll sleep now, but I cant wait to give it to you in the morning, will you wake me up early tomorrow”

That was too cute and it melted her baba’s heart and in baba’s words – “this is what I miss the most when I am not with you guys….I love her so much….”

We had a nice relaxing lazy breakfast in the morning, went out shopping a bit, exchanged some presents, all of us got back in our PJ (well PJs were our presents this Valentines…hahahaha) and watched some TV together.

I was happy that no more we were running around, trying to get a reservation in a restaurant at stupidly-late-hours in the night, for valentines day dinner. We were all happy, sitting together eating butter popcorn in the coziness of our home …valentines day has new meaning for us now and WE (Me and Hubby) love it this way.

God's most amazing creation

2010-02-17T22:52:00.001-05:00

Mother!
I am sure we all agree to that, and I hope we find that time to let the woman who gave us birth know, that what an amazing person she is (or was).

Very sadly, I want Gauri and Neel to know that today its been 10 years of us losing our most beloved mother, the Nani they unfortunately haven't meet, but the Nani who still continues to guide and motivate their mother (me) to try to be a good mother to them. My little babies, I hope I can be a mother just like your Nani, who will always love and care for you on earth or in heaven.

I do wish mom, you were here to sit by my bed-side and roll your finger through my hair when I would be sick; I wish you would still sing me the same lullaby that you used to when I couldnt fall asleep; I wish you were here to chat with me all night long while everyone was fast asleep; I wish you were hear to easy my fears, to wipe my tears, to share my excitement, to be proud of my achievemnets and above all to mother me, while I mothered my children. I miss you more than words could ever express.

This picture is my absolute favorite from my brother's wedding, its just that its little short of being perfect - I think its missing our mother, but so is every picture! We love you and miss you always, dear mother. Hope you are resting in peace.

Are we Home now?

2010-02-14T06:44:00.004-05:00

That’s what super-tired-completely-exhausted Gauri asked me when we finally sat down at our departure gate in Charlotte after being in transit for over 50+ hours changing several planes, having done atleast 12 or more security checks and being dragged every where on the airport at various ungodly hours for last couple of days…..

As some of you already know we had already missed our first return flight to US since I did not have a UK transit visa. Frankly, that was such a shocker for me and I couldn’t believe that was happening to us. Gauri was very sad and upset at why baba had not come to pick her up at the airport, poor thing didn’t quite understand that we were still in India.

Finally we decided to fly back via Germany since it didn’t require a transit visa. But it seems like trouble was spread like a battle-field mine in the entire journey. First, the plane from India couldn’t take off for over 4 hours due to some military issue. I knew we had already missed our connection from Munich to Boston but I was hopeful we’d get some flight back to US.

But upon landing on Munich airport, we were not allowed to enter the airport as the airport was shut down due to some security breach!! Great!! We were left at a place with little heat, very few chairs, no food, phone or even water. We waited for good 4 -5 hours when our patience started running out. It was getting very cold and kids were beginning to freeze sitting on the floor. I put down my shawl, coat etc to make it warmer for kids to sit . Gauri was getting more and more thirsty and couldn’t hold off any more. Upon asking a German immigration officer who spoke little English, he told that only place to get some water was from “the toilet” – are you kidding me was the expression on my face. But I had no choice, I went and brought some water from the T. At that point I literally got tears in my eyes; children who I have taken care so gently and carefully, I am now feeding them water from the toilet. I was desperate to find some help. Determined, I kept asking immigration officers to let me/ other passengers talk to Lufthansa officials. Finally they came – told us that there are no flights to the US for the day and we may have to wait at the airport with atleast 300 other passengers stuck in similar situation, but they could now take us into the airport. After about 4 security checks and stripping sleepy-cranky kids every time for the damn security check, taking care of our hand luggage, purse, passports and million other things we were inside the airport finally. Now the next hurdle – to get the first available flight to US (forget Boston, get me anywhere in the US, beggars cant be choosers). After another 2.5 hours of standing in queue, we were finally booked on a flight to Charlotte and another one from Charlotte to Boston for next day. Now the next hurdle was to fight for a transit visa so I could take the kids to a hotel and not have to spend the night with both kids and luggage on a terminal. Seeing the condition of my kids and literally begging and pleading we finally got transit visa to go into Germany (now 1 AM German time)
Again dragging sleepy kids with luggage from one end of the airport to another, to an exit, we finally sat inside a cab; to tell the truth I was Sh…scared at this time riding a cab all alone with kids and no phone, no local currency, no understanding of German language and absolutely no idea where the heck the cab driver was going to take us. But with fingers crossed and keeping Gods name in the heart we passed that 25 minute ride to the hotel. We were happy to be at the hotel and the staff there was extremely helpful and empathetic. We all had a nice 5 hour sleep and our back felt lot better and ready for another day of surprises.

Next morning we took our 10 hour flight to Charlotte only to land there and find out that immigration is going to take long and we will miss yet another connection to Boston – lovely!! Who invited Mr. Murphy to this trip?????
Anyway when sat at the terminal in Charlotte hoping that this be our FINAL flight in our attempt to reach Boston, I asked Gauri if she was excited to see baba, she said “I am tired mum, are we home now?”…. my heart went out to her and I gave her a big emotional hug, keeping my tears under control and thanking her for being such a cooperative kid during this entire mess. 5.5 hours later we were finally HOME!!
Happy Ending, Happy Faces...

Pre-school - so soon??

2009-09-24T00:58:00.001-04:00

Our little one is heading off on a big adventure -- preschool!
The first day of preschool has arrived (Monday Sept 21) and it's time for our little darling to begin an educational journey that will last nearly two decades. Gosh is she really that grown-up already – I remember bringing her home from the hospital, like it was yesterday!!

The night before, I talked to Gauri about her special day (she seemed very excited),

I am ready for School (the day before)

"I am so excited Neel"

picked her attire for the morning, packed some snack, she packed her back-pack with all sorts of stuff, teddy, doll, hair clip, toy cell phone, nighty-night Lucy book, a pair of clothing etc…..Alarms were set, with breakfast menu on mind, we went to bed early.

As we reached the school gate, I was feeling like I was going to cry any minute and as I dropped her off to her class and she asked me “mumma where are you going” my face turned red, my eyes were barely able to hold the tears in them any more, thanks to the teacher for pushing me to leave while letting Gauri know that I’ll be back after "picking up some groceries".
With little over 2 hours in hand, I did some grocery shopping (with no one asking to sit in those big- loud toycar shopping carts, so hard to maneuver and always stuck in the checkout lanes!), some laundry folding and organizing, and yes I also ate some breakfast that day! Yuppie!!.
Apart from all this, I had only one thing going on in the background – a hard-to-resist-urge to call the preschool about fifty times to ask, “Is she happy? Does she look happy? What’s she doing right now? How about now? Isn’t she wonderfully terrific? Don’t you agree she’s the most fantastic child ever? Does she look happy now? And now?”

God, I couldn’t wait to pick her up (no wonder I was sitting in the parking lot 20 minutes before the pick-up time). I miss my darling baby. And as soon as I picked her up – we hugged (real tight) and she asked “did baba and Neel miss me” and as Neel woke up from his nap and saw Gauri, he uttered excitedly - “ge-ge”; that’s it!! – Gauri said “I think mumma Neel missed me because he is smiling at ge-ge” (We think Neel calls Gauri Ge-ge). Gauri had the most wonderful stories to tell me all the way home !! :)

"I am ready to study too"

What's baking in our oven!!

2009-09-17T22:45:00.019-04:00

“When baking, follow directions. When cooking, go by your own taste.” ~Laiko Bahrs

I following this saying – religiously; because (as some of you already know) although I can cook quite okay but I am a pathetic baker! While my mom (the BEST cook ever, seriously) baked the most amazing cakes (and for everyone’s birthday, all cousins friend’s kids etc.) me on the contrary, fail, if I am even short of one ingredient. Baking does not come natural to me. So, I had never ventured into the area of cookies etc. But in an effort to keep Gauri busy and to fulfill her random demand of very specific shape and color cookies, I have tried several recipes in the past. And after several failed attempts, I can say that I have finally been able to bake some really decent cookies lately.

Several months ago we baked some Vegan chocolate chip cookies – vegan because Neel is allergic to dairy (just like Gauri was when she was less than an year old; I really do hope he also grows out of this pretty soon) and so I am on no-dairy-no-soy diet too. The cookies came out pretty good and my big air-tight container was empty by the end of second evening. Both Gauri and her baba gobbled them quick (Gauri actually eating something with that much likeness - Best compliment ever).

Recently we tried these “Pink” heart shortbread cookies (yes these days everything has to be pink or princess) and they were fantastic too. Not only did Gauri had much fun making then (Kneading the dough, using the cookie cutter and frosting them) but she and baba once again enjoyed them much. Neel and I just watched since they had butter this time (I’ll bake you some vegan cookies again Neel!). If anyone’s interested here is the simple recipe for shortbread (the key is to follow the recipe)

2 cups (260 grams) all-purpose flour
Note: I found that for delicate tasting shortbread with a melt-in-your-mouth texture, replace 1/2 cup flour with cornstarch
1/4 teaspoon (2 grams) salt
1 cup (2 sticks) butter
1/2 cup (60 grams) confectioners sugar
1 teaspoon vanilla extract

In the bowl cream the butter and sugar until smooth.
Add vanilla extract and then stir in the flour mixture.
Wrap the dough in plastic wrap, and chill for an hour.
Preheat oven to 350 degrees F with the rack in the middle of the oven.
Cut the dough into whatever shapes you wish.
Place the cookies on the baking sheet and place in the refrigerator for about 15 minutes.
Bake for 8 - 10 minutes.

Happy Baking everyone!!

Hanuman ji please give me toilet paper

2009-08-20T23:36:00.003-04:00

Tuesday night while I was trying to nurse Neel and sleep Gauri both at the same time, with lights turned off, to make it dark enough for Gauri to try to sleep (and stop playing with Neel, so he could also sleep), Gauri suddenly gets up and whispers in my ear – “I need to go potty”, and then we had the most interesting conversation of all times. Here is exactly how it went:

Gauri: “Mum I need to go Potty”
Me: “Are you sure?”
Gauri: “Yes, I have to”
Me: “Then go”
Gauri: “No, you take me”
Me: “I can’t I am nursing Neel”
Gauri: “Pleeeeeeease take me, please come with me”
Me: “No Gauri, I cant honey, just go…..you cant do it on your own, you are a big kid now”
Gauri: “but there’s Bandar(monkey) in the Bathroom”
Me: with a little stress in my voice “Gaaaaauriii – there is NOBandar, don’t make up things, just go if you have to”

Note: Somehow Gauri is scared of monkeys, and I really have no idea why and where did she get this in her head, but suddenly one day she stared saying –monkeys will hurt me…We were worried at first and asked her why she thinks so, but then we thought it probably is normal for kids her age to get the concept of being scared sometimes.

So anyway,
Gauri: “Will Hanuman ji ask Bandar to go away?”

Note:
As per Hindu mythology, Hanuman ji is an incarnation of God in the form of an Ape. He is considered the one who has the powers to take away all difficulties/ fight demons for anyone who prays unto Him

Me: “sure, yes He will”
Gauri steps down from the bed and stands at the door whispering
“Hanuman ji open the door”
“please open the door for Gauri”
Now with stress in the voice:
“Please open the door Hanuman ji”
“Hanuman ji – open the door for Gauri, I have to go potty”
I was trying to avoid talking since Neel was trying to fall asleep in my lap, but then I had to intervene between Gauri and her Hanuman ji conversation
Me: “Gauri Hanuman ji does not open the door, you open it and go”
So she finally did go.
After a few minutes I hear Gauri again:
“Hanuman ji please give toilet paper to me”
“Hanuman ji ??”
“Hanuman ji I need toilet paper”
“Hanuman ji please give toilet paper”
“Oh god - Hanuman ji please give me paper towel”
After asking Hanuman ji for several minutes, I guess Gauri took the Toilet paper own her own and very disappointed-ly came back to me. BY now Neel was asleep and I was free to talk to her.

Me: “Gauri are you okay, did your potty?”
Gauri: “yea, but Hanuman ji did not give me toilet paper mama”
Me: “Its Okay Gauri”
Gauri: “I don’t think Hanuman ji can scare away the monkeys if he cant open the door and give toilet paper to me”!!

She was quite disappointed that night and I was half laughing and half wondering what and how am I to explain such complex things like “God” to an inquisitive kid like my little “Sweet-pea”.
She slept disappointed but I slept smiling thinking about this funny dialogue.

Since I have no pictures from that day, here are a couple of new ones of all of us.

Happy Janmashtami

2009-08-15T00:29:00.007-04:00

Krishna Janmashtami, the festival celebrating the birth of Lord Krishna, is an important festival in the Hindu calendar. It is observed on the eighth day (according to the Lunar Calendar), of the dark half in the month of Shravana (again Lunar Calendar). I think personally, that this can be compared to the Christmas in the western world.

This is such a special festival for us specially because we all are Krishna Bhaktas (Devotees)and His Birthday is SUPER Special. Gauri already knows about “Krishna’ since she always offers prayers to Krishna before her meals (something that her nanu taught her and her prayers goes like this – with her eyes half closed half peeking she says “Krishna please eat this food ….please please please….” And sometimes she commands “Krishna eat ALL my food”, she looks so cute when she says that).

Every year we both observe fast the entire day and only eat/ drink after the birth of the Lord at midnight. Only milk and milk products are consumed, as these were the favorites of Lord Krishna (and mine too). We usually have a big celebration at our house and we invite lots of friends and family for the evening Puja, Abhishek and Prasadum. We also have some Krishna Games to add some fun to Krishna’s Birthday party but this year we choose to keep it small since both Neel and Gauri were super exited and it didnt seem feasible to cook that lavish Prasadum, decorate our Deities with wew clothing, jewelery and flowers and I knew its would be too tempting for Neel (now crawling) to leave ‘Baal-Gopal” on his alter. Last year we had a mini-accident when Gauir burnt her palm in an attempt to grab the light Inscent stick; we knew it would be best to keep the celebration very small this time. But we still had lots of fun and while Mani and I were singing our favorite Bhajans, Gauri declared “where is Krishna’s Elmo cake?” and “we need to sing Happy Birthday to Krishna” and “Krishna says he wants Balloons” – I wasn’t surprised at her demands – she was right, that’s the minimum we need to do for a birthday. Sorry Gauri – I’ll remember the Cake and the Balloons next year. Both Gauri and Neel dressed in traditional Indian clothes and boy did they ever look cuter!!

Happy Janmashtami to All – Hari Bool!!

2009-08-11T14:06:00.003-04:00

Ok, so if you have been wondering where are we and what is Gauri up to these days here is a little update on Gauri (Neel's to follow shortly). This summer has probably been the most wonderful summer for me. I am having a blast with Gauri and Neel (of course sometimes they both do drive me crazy and I do feel that my IQ level, my vocab, my music repertoire are now that of a 2 year old, but still I don't remember having this much fun ever).

Gauri is a very energetic little girl and she does keep me on my toes. I need to keep her busy with challenging stuff otherwise she get very weepy and irritated. She has a never quenching thirst for books, and so we do visit the library VERY often. She loves to pick up new books from there and meet her friends from the "story time" program. I have to say, she loves to play with most of them but she prefers to play with older kids and read with them rather than the younger or even same age as her (I think that's the trait she picked from her dad, at least that's what Mani tells me).

Another interesting thing right now is the "pretend games" we play these days. Gauri is super super imaginative and is always coming up with new pretend games, her most favorite one is to play "Amma-dadu" (Grandma-Grandpa). She will mostly put a scarf around her neck just like her Amma (Amma wearing Salwar-Kameez) and pretend being amma and I will have to paint a mustache on my face and pretend to be dadu and she can play this game for hours all together.... another one of her favorite pretend games is playing Doctor-patient and I am always the patient and she is always the Doctor, She loves being the Dr. (ah, how I wish that she actually becomes one.....and yes I do remember that my Favorite toy as a little girl was always a stethoscope - hah what a coincidence)!!

Apart from that she has been dancing dancing and dancing on all sorts of songs since she was only about 20 months and this summer she showed great interest in ballet, so I finally did find a ballet school for her. She was super excited when she heard that we would be going for ballet class, we bought her ballet attire and she couldn't keep her hands, rather feet off those Ballet shoes....
She loves it there and keeps asking every day "do we have ballet class today?". She is probably the youngest of all in that class but definitely not least intimidated, fluttering around like a butterfly and chatting nonstop like a lil' monkey and looking so so so graceful, super cute I mean.

Here is a sneak-peek of her class.

We plan to continue ballet into fall and if possible Gauri might be able to perform next summer. I am super excited that she is learning dance (as some of you already know, I learned classing Indian dance growing up and was always performing as a little girl and I still love dance, oh and I still remember my first dance teacher's name - Ms. Krapa, and boy she was so strict and such disciplinarian that I almost hated her at that time) and I so wish that Gauri does embrace this form of art, it is very relaxing, uplifting, graceful and teaches self-discipline.

Apart from this we are also taking ice-skating for several weeks, and although Gauri can walk with those skates on, she still has days when she would not skate atall, but she loves being on the ice when it is scorching 90 degrees outside. I dont have any pictures from that but I'll soon post some.

And the most wonderful thing of all - Both Gauri and Neel are playing together very nicely. I have to give credit to Gauri for being super nice with Neel and although she has her moments of not wanting to share "her" toys with him but she will soon find something that she is willing to let Neel have. And they do have a blast whenever they are in the water together. I am so proud of her, being a baby herself yet acting such a nice big sister. May their love continue to grow like this forever.

All this and much more keeps Ms. curious somewhat busy otherwise, I was beginning to believe that "terrible twos" is truly terrible, now I think its "terrific"!!

Our visit to the ER

2009-06-14T01:33:00.003-04:00

For those of you who are wondering what’s going on at our end, I am sorry I have been slacking at providing updates. I will soon post detailed updates on Gauri and Neel – I promise. But for now I’ll just say – we had the most scary evening this past Thursday. Gauri was out with Nanu for their evening walk, Neel and I were home, having our one-on-one time alone when Mani came back rather early from his racket ball game. I was surprised as well as happy that he was back soon. But within a few moments I realized that he was actually choking, barely able to talk, coughing vigorously and unable to breathe. I realized that this was his allergies, but this time it was worse. When he just couldn’t breathe, he signed me to quickly rush him to the ER (emergency Room). Fortunately, papa was back with Gauri and I only said “I am taking him to the ER, Neel’s with me, you take care of Gauri, and I’ll call…” We left in a panic and Manish kept insisting that I jump those one million traffic lights each one of which was Red this time, I was trying to keep my head straight while driving a screaming baby and chocking husband. As soon as we reached the ER the ER staff realized that his condition was rather critical because he was complaining of inability to breathe and therefore they asked me to register him while they already took him in. As we (Neel and I) registered him, my head was running in all directions, “Is he OK ? does he need me right now? He doesn't have a cell home with him? What about Gauri – would she be crying at home? Should I call papa – Damn no cell phone signal here. Neel’s crying, he is hungry, what can I give him, Jeez, he just pooped…oh shoot I forgot the Diaper bag in the car, cant go back to the parking lot now….” My brain’s CPU was running at 100% and was ready to hang, when the nurse asked me if I wanted to go see my husband. “Yes, ofcourse”. Ok so things were only going to get worse – they (hospital staff) couldn’t find him in any of their rooms!! “Sorry we cant seems to find your husband here” said the nurse. “Ok let me ask someone”, “ I am surprised where did they take him”…..I was almost about to have a panic attack, because only they worst possibilities were coming in my head at that time. Thanks goodness they finally found him. But those 15 minutes seemed like forever to me. I was relieved to see that he was able to breathe now. With a million monitors on him, and IV and what now and a zillion other drugs already injected in my poor hubby, “the situation is under control now” the nurse said. We were informed that it could take several hours before a doctor would be able to see him. The Doctor saw him at around 10:30 and reported that it was definitely a result of one of his severe food allergies (in this instance the culprit was nuts in the laddoo he ate before heading out for the game that evening). With a long list of antihistamines and other Allergy drugs , we finally got home by 11. Thank God, everything was Ok with him, Gauri was super excited to accompany me to the hospital to bring baba home. “I missed you baba” were her exact words as he entered the car when I picked him up at the ER door. We have see an allergist now, to figure things out and understand the dos and the don’ts regards to his eating. For now, I am putting away ALL Indian sweets out of his sight.

Let's celebrate Mothers

2009-05-09T22:22:00.010-04:00

Happy Mothers Day to all the amazing women whose nick name is any of the following:

“Ma, Mother, Mummy, Mommy, Mom, Mum…” basically, “mother” in any language. You are all fabulous, doing a great job and know that you mean the world to your children.

Being a full-time mother is one of the highest salaried jobs I have ever had, since the payment is abundance of - pure love. And after being a full time mommy myself, I truly believe that all mothers are “working mothers" and their job does not end ever – not even after the kids go to bed or when they are away from her because a mother never quite leaves her children at home/ daycare/ babysitter - even when she doesn't take them along she is still always thinking about them. So here’s to all the mothers and mother like figures who have worked so so so very hard every day (and night) of their life to serve (their children) unconditionally!! Cheers to you all!!

I read this wonderful Quote by a writer named Rajneesh -

"The moment a child is born, the mother is also born. She never existed before. The woman existed, but the mother, never. A mother is something absolutely new."

How very true – I believe it’s a God’s blessing to be a mother. As a woman I would have never realized the pleasure of loving someone unconditionally; never realized that I had the strength to sleep only couple of hours (if even that) every night and still have the sanity to care for an infant day and night; I would have never realized that nothing can warm my heart like when my child smiles back at me, that most precious birthday present is not another diamond but opening my eyes to the soft sound of my child singing “happy Birthday” to me. So here’s to our children who made us mothers and made us COMPLETE – Cheers!!

And last but not the least, here’s to MY MOM –

She was a petite woman (as some of you already know) but she had a heart so large that everybody's joys found welcoming abode in it, every ones sorrows found a hospitable accommodation in it .

Ma, I miss you every day of my life, your image is the deepest impression on my heart and your voice still resounds in me. You are like a never ending song of comfort, happiness and belonging-ness in my heart; the words of which I may sometimes forget but I always remember the tune.

Special thanks to hubby dear, for giving up their wife to be a mother first, for living with a woman who the kids sometimes (or should I say almost all the time) driving absolutely insane and crazy and far from being perfect and most of all accepting the new woman that emerges from sleeplessness, screaming kids, no time to shower, seen mostly in sweat-pants, cooking meals with either too much salt or too little sugar, who either sings a lullaby or yells or talks in sarcasm - basically a woman they didn't marry!! So to you dear hubby for accepting us with all our imperfections.

Big Day - Big Realization

2009-04-24T09:53:00.006-04:00

So this past Sunday we celebrated our 9th wedding anniversary. Gosh!! does time fly any quicker? I still remember very vividly the hot summer afternoon of April 19th when the temperatures were soaring the usual 100 degree F and the lu (the hot wind that blows in the Northern part of India) had started early morning at around 9:30 AM when we were doing the pre-wedding ceremonies (Eechh- Baan) in the courtyard of our old ancestral house (Peeli Kothi - as it used to be popularly known as in those days). I was trying to get out of the house to go to the “Beauty Parlor” for getting ready with makeup and wedding dress and I got late in reaching there; I will never forget that the woman beautician actually shouted at me and got me in to tears for being late and not bringing the flowers that she thought she had informed me to bring with me for my Hair decoration…..of course it was a very busy day for her, she said she had 8 other brides to get ready for the same time!! But it was My Wedding day too and wasn’t I suppose to be special (at least I thought so in my mind) how dare she be so rude to me, now that I think of it, I guess I was under too much pressure back then at that particular time to get ready and be out on time so I bursted into tears and holy cow did my eyes ever swell that bad!! But anyway, long story short, the events of that Special day are still as fresh as yesterday’s in my mind. Here are a couple of pictures that could dig out (our wedding album is in India) of both of us 9 years ago :o) This year we didn’t do much on our anniversary; I was Super tired of being awake almost the entire 3 nights in a row, plus we were in Boston and it’s a significant enough change for the kids, No nap in last 2 -3 days, we were doing late night eating out/ party (my cousin’s birthday Celebration), so all I wanted was a “normal” day. Yes, I have to admit, with so much going on, we hadn’t planned anything special for the day. But my dear brother, the wonderful gracious host, the young enthusiastic and let’s-make-things-special kind-a-guy that he is, decided to treat us every which way possible. But when I turned down all his offers and he saw that the entire day had “just” gone by, he convinced us to go out for an early dinner at this Fancy Cambodian Restaurant next to his place on Harvard Sq. Wonderful ambiance, excellent location, beautiful people all around, the place was definitely special. Neel was asleep so I was quite hopeful that we will have a wonderful meal finally. BUT - Even before the dinner was served, both Gauri and Neel were out of control because it was past their bedtimes and they are not used to so much noise/ stimulation and I was feeling like everyone was staring at us (Me). The food, whatever I was able to taste, was awesome, but to tell the truth, I was feeling out of place. This place was not meant for parents of infants/ toddlers, it was too classy for Mommy-me. Although, Mani did love the experience and I too liked the food but I had to run out(literally) with Neel, in the middle of the dinner (of course, frustrated somewhat) because his crying was getting louder and louder and I wasn’t able to swallow even a single bite anymore. So the weekend was a big realization that we do NEED to change our lifestyle - no more late night parties, socializing, eating out with the kids. I have accepted this change ever since Gauri came into our lives and more so after having Neel but I think it will take its own time for Daddy to give-in. I sincerely feel too bad for Mani since he is such a social being and loves to socialize/ entertain specially on weekends. But I do know that this is a temporary situation and only in a couple of years we will again be ready for more adventure, more celebrations!!

Too Sexy for any hair!!

2009-04-13T22:39:00.011-04:00

The little man now has a new hair style officially – “Baldy”!!

On April 8 2009, Neel had his "Mundan" ceremony – Baba was the official Barber (Naai) and I have to say he did a wonderful job. Neel sat in his lap the entire time and credit also goes to my little darling for being extremely patient the entire time – not a single tear, no fuss and baba did and excellent job – not a single cut!! So where was I during this time? Oh welll, I was holding Ms. Gauri and keeping her busy with camera and the camcorder since he was very fascinated with the clipper and absolutely amused with Neel’s new hair style.

Holding the Tripod - our designated photographer for the occasion.

Neel’s newly shaved head made him look SUPER cute and I have to admit that I am totally loving his clean shaved head…No hair and a big smile -makes me crazy(er) about him.

Gauri says “Neo looks funny” "Neo is Ganju Pateel"…..hahahaha…..Oh but I think she doesnt really like the idea of head-shave because she woke up one night crying and calling her baba, murmering "baba, no cut Gauri hair like Neo's". I felt really bad that what impact did this have on her. Next day morning I talked to her and tried to explain that we will never cut her hair like "neos" but that little babies get thicker nicer hair after Mundan, we even showed her the pcitures of her mundan and how cute she looked in those. She is OK now.

I remember, Gauri was born with such thick hair and they grew thicker and longer so quickly that it almost broke my heart to do her mundan. Gauri - 3 days old.

I had spent hours on internet trying to find reasons why “mundane” is such a big deal and why is it necessary and if there really is a logic in this….and I did find some interesting information. In Hindu culture it is believed that the hair from birth is associated with undesirable traits from past lives (Hindus believe in re-birth). Thus at the time of the mundan, the child is freshly shaven to signify freedom from the past and moving into the future. The rite is performed as a special ceremony in most homes, for young children and then the hair are offered to the holy river (Ganga). We have also saved Neel’s hair to take with us to India of offering in the Ganges. So we had finally decided to shave off our little darling but my tears were shedding at the same speed at which her hair was falling. It was probably the hardest thing for me (to see her bald after being used to seeing her with full head of gorgeous hair).

Gauri after her Mundan

But either that Neel had much less hair to being with, or that I had become somewhat conditioned to this or probably because My little man looks all the more handsome with shaved head – no tears were shed by mum this time !!

Welcome Spring - Holi hai...

2009-03-29T20:10:00.008-04:00

You miss something when u don’t get it. All those years when I used to hide in my room to avoid colors, I now remember fondly and make efforts to re-live them (कोई लौटादे मेरे बीते हुए दिन …). I recall fondly the good old days when I used to play Holi….sweet Gujjiyas, the lip-smacking जलजीरा (cool-mint-drink), राइ का पानी, ठंडाई और भांग (almond-flavored-milk), chaant-pakore, abiir and gulal (dry colors), टेसू के फूल (yellow flowers used for coloring water), पानी के गुब्बारे (water balloons) and those रंग भरी पिचकारी (water sprinklers)… holi-ka-jalana (Holi-bon-fire) and nani ke ghar holi ka khaana (food at grandma's)…..ah those were the days!!

Now after almost 10 years of having nobody throwing colors on me here in the US, I am missing them all the more...

After having Gauri and Neel the significance of festivals has changed. Now I try to learn and understand how each of our festivals are celebrated in India (in our family – of course I never paid much attention to those details while growing up. Of course all those details I would arrogantly call as “un-necessary rituals, and of course I took so much for granted because mummy-papa would take care of all these details and we would simply be required to do very little and just enjoy the fun and the food…..)

I really want Neel and Gauri to know all our Indian traditions, the old tales of dadi-ma and the love people have for each other and how us Indians love to party and celebrate and know how to have a great time. I don’t want them to miss anything even if they are so so so far away from India.

So This year I planned a traditional holi party at our house, inviting friends and family. We had the traditional food and played with gulaal and wet (kids-friendly) colors. Gauri had so much fun, she keeps asking every now and then, when can she once again paint everyone’s faces with colors.

We had a wonderful time, thanks to all our friend and family and it was great way of welcoming the Spring finally.

Here’s a video from one of Hindi Movie’s, giving an idea of how we play Holi in India and specially Uttar Pradesh.

Love Before First Sight

2009-02-28T16:26:00.006-05:00

I have to admit that I was SO busy raising a toddler (Gauri) that I had absolutely zero time to think about my pregnancy with Neel and about the new baby. When I was pregnant with Gauri, the love hormone oxytocin was hitting me so hard that I was practically swimming in love, I was definitely in love with that baby growing inside me even before seeing that baby. But with Neel, I was always tired and exhausted running after Gauri all day so I didn’t feel that connected initially but when I finally got to hold him (well, its worth mentioning here, when he was born he wouldn’t let go of the umbilical cord, he was holding it real tight) , my brain finally broke through the exhaustion and pain of labor and gave me a feeling of euphoria and intense love.

It was like love at first sight! I, once again fell in love like never before. The feeling of adoration hit as soon as I saw Neel. It was like I wasn't even living before I looked at my baby the first time

One thing I realized after giving birth to two wonderful babies is that the bond between parent and child is one of the strongest connections in nature. Romances come and go, but once you've bonded with your baby you're probably hooked for life, and not because you enjoy the prospect of changing thousands of diapers but because the love you feel for your child is the strongest bond, and your child is equally ready to connect with you.

Now that Neel already smiles and coos at me and his eyes follows me even if he is in anybody else’s arms, my heart just fills up with pride and love so intense, that I feel like I am falling in love every day.

On the other hand I have Gauri, who is not ready to “share” me with anybody – nobody. She is so attached to me that she wants me a 100% of the time. Even at night she wakes up and calls for me Sometimes I feel like she should be able to do her own things or atleast take help from baba or her amma, but when I think about how she feels, I feel like waking her up from her sleep and giving her a big hug and a big kiss and letting her know that she makes me feel VERY SPECIAL.

Both Gauri and Neel have made me realize that I am the most important person for someone and that I am need by them all the time. I cant think of even a single moment that I want to be away from them. I am in love and I am hooked to this feeling for life.

Cupid or (love) Bandit?

2009-02-17T13:59:00.008-05:00

I’ll take MY love bandit any day.

Years ago, in fact over a decade ago (OK, now I feel old ), when cupid hit us, Mani and I fell in love and we will ever be so grateful to Dear Cupid for sending love in our lives and for arranging us to meet our soul-mates in this huge world.

And now while Mani found a NEW Sweet heart (whom I love like crazy too), I have my very own Love Bandit too, to celebrate this very special Valentines day with.

We had a fun filled day and although we didn’t go out on a dinner date or a romantic getaway or anything cliché like that, we still ended up having the BEST Valentine’s day ever.

Gauri and her Baba had a very special play date the eve of Valentine’s day and she was super excited and very happy to go out with just Baba (who is usually too busy to be able to spend some alone time with Miss. Bansal). “We had Fun” – said Gauri when they returned back.

“I want to look Beautiful Mumma”, “Baba wear this” were her other big comments that evening while getting ready for their Date. I was so happy to see her so happy.

I had some surprise flowers delivered – how sweet was that!! Thanks so much Jijaji, you are simply wonderful.I also got a bag full of thoughtful selection of Old Romantic classics like – “When Harry Meet Sally” and some beautiful music among other things like Chocos and flower.

Gauri and Neel gave presents to Amma and Baba and boy did they ever look cuter!!

Happy Valentines Day everyone, hope you all had fun with your special ones.

Short, Bald and Toothless

2009-01-12T10:07:00.009-05:00

Who knew the love of my life would be Short, Bald and Toothless (instead of Tall, Dark and Handsome)!!
Here’s my darling little Neel who took his fist breathe in this world on 6th day of December 2008 at 2:32 AM at L&M hospital in New London, CT – United States.

Welcome to my arms my precious baby!!

Sadly remembered....

2009-01-12T00:12:00.007-05:00

For each thorn, there's a rosebud...
For each twilight — a dawn...
For each trial — the strength to carry on,
For each storm cloud — a rainbow...
For each shadow — the sun...
For each parting — sweet memories
When sorrow is done.
—Ralph Waldo Emerson

No farewell words were spoken,
No time to say good-bye,
You were gone before we knew it,
And only God knows why.
Our hearts still ache in sadness,
And secret tears still flow,
You will always remain the most wonderful
brother, uncle, dad and much more
this is what we want you to know.

This goes for my most loving chachu who left this world on the 7th day of January 2009 to start his new journey into the Kingdom of God. May you find peace and our family the strength to deal with sorrow of losing you.

And she waited

2008-12-09T19:40:00.002-05:00

Those beautiful eyes, waiting, waiting patiently for the arrival of that little someone - who mumma had been telling her is inside mumma's belly; someone who would be all her's, that someone who will make her A BIG SISTER, that special baby who she wouldn't have to say "bye-bye" to after playing for a short while but will take him home, to stay with her forever. Our darling little Gauri waiting for her little Brother Neel's first glimpse!!

Letter to Gauri on her 2nd Birthday

2008-12-05T23:00:00.007-05:00

Dear Gauri,

Sorry I am so late in posting this entry about your second birthday. As you know you are soon going to be a Big Sister – mumma is kind of tired and a lot more busy lately and therefore so late in posting this entry.

But we, including you had lots of fun on your birthday this year. You were super excited for your birthday a week in advance. You love Elmo, Big Bird and Cookie Monster right now, so your birthday theme this year was of course - Sesame Street.

You had a very special Elmo Cake, Elmo, Big Bird and Cookie Monster cookies and Elmo books for your friends and the entire wall was covered with your favorite Sesame Street friends.

Mama (uncle) Abhi and Chachu Harry had both come from Boston and NJ on the weekend to celebrate this beautiful day with us. You were super excited to see them and had lots of fun with both. We made Chinese food for your party since that was the cuisine that I ate the night before you came into this world, and of course you still like the Chinese White rice anytime. Your baba made most amazing veggie dumplings that even you enjoyed eating. In the evening you friends came with their mommy and daddies and you had an absolute blast with them. You were too funny – you liked Shealyn’s shoes so much so that you took off yours and insisted that you exchange yours with hers. Her mom had to bring another pair of similar shoes for her to wear so you could enjoy putting your feet in hers. It was simply wonderful to see how nicely you played with her and how delicately you handled baby Aadi.

Everyone spoiled you completely with wonderful presents and lovely Elmo cards. You also got your first “baby” (kid safe doll) on this birthday (You baba does not like dolls that much so he never let you have a doll until now!!) You were absolutely thrilled to have the baby among other wonderful presents.

On the day of your birthday you got phone calls from Amma dadu, Bu-Phu, Chachu-Chachi-Cheenu, Nanu, Chhote Nanu-Mama, Meme, Poo Mausi and Nani, Your friend Ishaan- Sara Mausi, Gita Nani-Prabhakar mama and although you are always eager to talk on phone always, but that day you finally declined to talk anymore (you never do that, you ALWAYS insist that I put you on phone as soon as you see me talking on phone, but I guess you never expected that you will be talking on phone this much in just one day.) That was not all, my email-box was full with e-cards and other birthday wish emails for you. Boy – did I ever get even half as many cards and birthday emails for my Birthday?? Never!! You are too fortunate to have SO many people love and care for you. I think you are too cute and sweet and have almost captivated everyone around you in your love. Your Baba and I love you very much and thanks God every single day for choosing us as your parents and giving us the opportunity to witness you leelas (activities). Happy Birthday and Happiness Always.

Love

Ma-Baba

Note: I was trying to post this entry while I was in labor with Neel (and of course in denial that I was in Labor)

Pumpkins and Witches....

2008-11-13T14:00:00.005-05:00

And a very lovely Ladybug.

Before coming to America I had absolutely no idea what Halloween was. But now I find Halloween to be such a fun festival specially after having Gauri its extra special to us now. Its fun to see all the little ones dressed up in fun costumes and even more fun to dress up your own little one (yea, only if they are in the mood to dress up that day).
Last year I wanted Gauri to dress up in a lady bug costume but at the last minute she revolted – didn’t want to wear that red and black lady bug overall….oh how disappointed I was. Change of plans – I dressed her in yellow and black and painted her face with black whiskers put tiger ears and tail on her and there you go!! Huff!!

This year as she looked at her last year’s pictures (in lady bug costume, yes I did manage to get a few pictures taken before the big revolt) she yelled out – “I want to be a bug mum”. I said “Gauri how about Elmo or big bird?”, she instantly replied “NO”. I thought she’d be happy to dress up elmo since he’s her current favorite, but I was wrong. She loves elmo and big bird but that didn’t mean she wanted to be one. She kept insisting she wanted to be Lady bug. So who am I then to disregard little-miss-determined’s wishes. She dressed like a lady bug, although the antennas on her head were too tempting and she didn’t want to put them on her head really. Oh Well!!

Thankfully this year Daddy was home to take her out Trick-a-Treating!! Gauri was thrilled to ring everyone’s door bells and receive “treats”, she didn’t care about the treats although! But what she liked most was – having the opportunity to ring every neighbor’s door bells. Funny, she thought it was now acceptable to ring their bells every day….hahahaha…our poor neighbors – she continued to ring their bell every-time we returned home from a trip out of the house…..It took me some time to try to explain her why she couldn’t ring their bell anymore. Now she continues to wait for the next Halloween not only to dress up but mostly to have a chance to ring everyone’s door bells freely!!

Thank God

2008-10-23T23:12:00.006-04:00

Now this may look like a really cute funny face, but some serious business was going on when this picture was taken.
So last friday at bath time we had something that I have been dreading for a long time now. When Gauri was in the middle of her water fun in her bath tub, she suddenly announced - "Mumma I need to go elmo potty". I thought I didnt hear her correctly so I confirmed "You need to go potty?" and then she literally screamed "Emmo Pooppuuuuuuuuu".....
Oh shoot she was not kidding she wanted to go and I had just put shampoo on her head and she was all covered with soap, I quickly scooped her out of the tub and put her on her emmo potty and there you go..... (you can imagine what - right?)
2 seconds later she said "Mumma its hot" - "hot?" I thought to myself and then I noticed goose pumps all over her wet body. Oh she meant she was cold (somehow she does not say cold - only hot). I quickly wrapped her in the towel and let her do her business.

Once warm and done with her P business, she staretd acting all silly and that when I took these funny pictures.

Later I thanked her for informing me in a timely manner. Can't be more thankful to her, because had she not told me, I cant even begin to imagine what a mess it would have been in that bath tub!! She is truly wonderful, always helping her mommy!!

I thought this was too funny (although the thought of her not being able to tell me in time still scares me at times during the bath time)

Gauri's Current Favorites

2008-10-13T22:36:00.011-04:00

With less than 3 weeks to go for the second birthday, I was trying to think of her last Birthday and all the changes she has had since past one year. She is such a “complete” person right now with likes, dislikes and a VERY Good Vocabulary to express her feelings. So I am trying to capture here some of her latest Likes…..

Here are some of Gauri’s current favorites:

Favorite Sport – anything to do with Water…splashing water

Favorite Pass time – Book reading, walking the stuffed animals in her doll stroller

Favorite Book – Read and Grow with Pepper (I have to admit I am completely tired of that book now!!), Elmo flip Book

Fun activity – Making Bubbles, Horse Riding (Baba the horse)

Favorite Character – Big Bird, Elmo, Zoe

Favorite TV show – Curious George, Sid the science Kid

Favorite Poem –Baba Black sheep, 8 Silly Monkeys

Favorite Song – Ring Around the Rosy

Favorite Fruit – Strawberry, Banana

Favorite Food item – Cheese (Amul Slice Only), Sticky Rice

Favorite Drink – Strawberry Milk (In elmo cup Only)

Favorite Animal – Mo-mo (the Cow), Mew Mew (the Cat)

Favorite Insect – Ant (Thanks to the song - Ants go marching…)

Favorite Dress – flower Dress, lengha Chooli (Indian long skirt and top)

Favorite Shoe – White Flower Sandals, and big Boots

Favorite Toy – Red Dog (the Baby), Jojo the monkey

Favorite "pretend play": Fetch Coffee for Mumma and baba, going out shopping for the house.

Favorite Parent: Baba of course (The kind can tell from his footsteps if its him and hugs him for hours when he returns back from work trips)

Least favorite things: Getting hair done, going to the grocery store with Mumma (OK that may be Mumma's least Favorite thing to do. Who wants to go grocery shopping with an always-on-the-go, pick-up-random-stuff-and-put-in-your-shopping-card toddler??).

The Healing Kiss

2008-09-22T12:00:00.001-04:00

Gauri giving a "Healing Kiss" to her friend after he got little hurt during the play time.
She really believes that you go to the doctors office to get Stickers and any boo boo can be healed simply by a KISS.
If she ever falls down and gets a scratch or so, she immediately comes running asking for a "Healing-kiss" and if she were to accidentally hurt someone or saw someone crying she will coming running to give a kiss and take away the pain. She believes in the magic of kiss - I wish we were all so innocent - life would have been so much simpler and easier!!

Some weekend fun

2008-09-08T13:57:00.003-04:00

With the weather being so hot and humid this past weekend, Gauri decided to have some more fun with water before summer is officially over. Here are a couple of pictures of our little mermaid having fun and posing for the photo session in her new princess-swim-suite.

Has it already been 22 months?

2008-09-03T12:10:00.005-04:00

Today our little munchkin turns 22 months! Cant believe how past 2 years almost flew away….This morning I woke up and as I told Gauri that today she is turning 22 Months, I said to myself – “holy Cow – she is going to be 2 in just about 2 months!!” Its truly unbelievable and I am surprised where did the past two years slip away….I still remember holding her for the very first time in my arms….my first glance at her and my very first words – “She is mine ….all mine….she is my daughter…..she is SOOOO Beautiful” with tears flowing down my cheeks and my heart throbbing with excitement of holding that wonderful, beautiful, precious little baby who was definitely all mine. And soon she is turning 2 – unbelievable. These past 6 months I have not been able keep upto speed in writing about her new activities – part of the reason – I just cant catch up with the speed at which she is learning new things, discovering new ideas, speaking new words and now sentences (her Favorite sentence these days is - I want MY…so and so…), showing new emotions, new attitude (yes I mean ATTITUDE – sometimes she truly acts like a toddler – did they call it “Terrible Twos”?? I believe it now), her likes, dislike and strong favorites. So it has been almost impossible to pen-down every night what new thing happened that day because she really is doing new stuff every single day.

Her latest achievement these days is using the toilet and she call it “my Elmo Potty” and she loves it. She likes the idea of having her very own Elmo potty to go on and she is definitely getting aware of when she needs to use it. Its been almost 3 weeks now that she has been using it and last 8 days she has also been able to tell us when she needs to go. Although sometimes she just loves the idea of using it and sitting on it reading her fav “Pepper-book” and the toilet tissue and the flush….and its sometimes impossible to convince her to get down. But I feel happy that potty training for us has been not so difficult task so far. Thank you Gauri for making it so easy for Mumma and Baba.

Apart from Elmo - her biggest obsession, she is also crazy about water….not only does she loves to play in her little pool, she loves to water her plants and sneak behind me and wash wash wash her hands and splash water everywhere….:o( not so much fun for me to cleanup and change her and take her away from water.

Oh and she definitely has her favorite person picked up – who other than her Baba…

the kid adores him and is crazy about him. No wonder she stops eating and gets cranky when daddy is away on business trips. I feel sorry for her when she runs upstarirs to look for her daddy and then in the basements and when he is found no-where she’ll bring the phone up to me asking “Mamma,….Baba phone please”…..truly daddy little girl.

Well I could just go on and on writing about her new activities but I’ll resort to posting more pictures with some titles instead. Our little baby is turning into a little girl for sure and she is getting even more adorable and fun and life’s getting full of excitement.

A Tribute to our Father

2008-08-30T22:10:00.003-04:00

Today marks the 60 years of glory of the most humble, forgiving, honest and pious person I have ever known. And I am so proud to call this person my father
, that I have simply zero words to describe who he is and what he has meant to us - his children. We are not the only ones to be blessed with his presence in our lives - many many many of his friends, family member and simple acquaintances will easily vouch for his simplicity and purity of heart. On this very special day I share this letter we (My brother and I) wrote to him to express our deepest gratitude for his never ending love and care.

Our Dearest Papa,

It’s after all these years that that this special day has come when we truly want to celebrate you and your lifetime achievements and yet, it’s hardly enough to describe what you do and what you have done for us and our family. You have taught us, personally, so much. Our gratitude and love for you is immeasurable.

You taught us to work hard and enjoy family. You taught us the price of honesty and that it cannot be negotiated. You taught us about life by always setting up a personal example… and we are humbly grateful to you – our life long teacher.

When we were young, I would wake you up in the middle of the night asking for milk- fearing that I would suckle my thumb otherwise and you would get up every single night to fetch me milk. We would wake you up to go to the bathroom with us since we were scared and you would give up you sleep just to comfort us and make us feel secure… for this we are grateful to you - our pillar of strength and support.

When we were growing up, you were stern when you needed to be, but mostly loving because you just couldn’t stand not loving us for a single moment. Never once did we not feel your love, even when you were angry. For this – your immense patience with us and never seizing love we are grateful to you – our guide and mentor.

And now, that we have grown, we remember the mornings we have had together and the many more mornings we will share. Although, the distances have increased physically, but we always remain close in thoughts and heart and the most important thing that has not changed is how we still look up to you - our Hero, our Guide and the Best Friend ever!

We love you, our dearest Papa, exactly like we told you when we were young… “we love you like the sun, big and warm and shiny”

With Love,
Your Children

Celebrating Dads

2008-07-08T15:16:00.012-04:00

We had a wonderful father’s day celebration with Gauri this year. She knew it was father’s day because she and I were busy preparing card and planning the activities for that day for quite some time.

We hope we treated daddy well. Gauri and I delivered him “bed-tea” "in bed" along with his favorite snacks (I am sure after becoming parents it’s a privilege to wake up to an already-awake-happy-kid, with no need of dragging yourself out of bed and running in full speed to get the little one ready without getting them upset. I would imagine, having Tea in bed must be every parents' dream-come-true). The smile on daddy’s face when he woke up was priceless and the big hug and kiss from Gauri – absolutely heavenly.

Gauri gave baba 2 gifts – a Movie Day Pass (a day of his choice where all he does is sit on the couch and watch his fav movies ALL-Day-Long. Godfather, Starwars, whatever he wishes, snacks and drinks placed at arms distance so he doesn't have to even open the refrigerator or get up from the couch, baby sitting and mommy-sitting all included) …. Hummm does that sound like every guy’s dream day or what?? I am sure daddy was thrilled.

We also found a special SPA place and really cool package for daddy called “Real dads do SPA”. After talking to the spa staff, we were sure it would be a fun experience for daddy and a much relaxing one too.

We spent the evening with 3 other dads and their little ones, two of whom we were meeting for the first time and had much fun making new friends with. While the dads were BBQing and chatting and having good laughs, all the mommies were making sure they keep the little one fully entertained so we didn’t have to look up to dads for any help (well, alteast for a few hours). Gauri played nicely with other kids and was very supportive of dad by trying to remain awake till 9 PM or so. After that she was almost ready to crash and fell asleep on our way back. Thanks to our wonderful friends for planning the BBQ party, we all had wonderful time and made new friends.

I have to admit that we the moms, sometimes take dads for granted and think of them as second parents but in fact it’s far easier to be a father than a dad. The level of personal commitment that our kids require is challenging, sometimes even overwhelming. Without the support of these wonderful life partners whom our kids call “dad”, we would not be able to "survive" - at times.

I found this interesting statistic on Career Builders’ annual Father’s Day survey thought it’s worth sharing:

Survey showed that 37% of working dads would leave their jobs if their spouse made enough money to support the family.

Given the choice, another 38% would take a pay-cut to spend more time with their kids.

FathersAtWork.com reported that 70% of working fathers have a difficult time balancing their professional and personal responsibilities.

When we became parents, we made a life decision that carries more responsibility than any other. Without the commitment and support of both parents I cant imagine how we would ever be able to make these tiny people responsible and good human beings. Thanks to all the dads for being the pillars of support for the family.

First BIG Boo-Boo

2008-05-30T10:34:00.004-04:00

Sorry we have not been updating the blog lately and I so wanted to let you all know about Gauri’s first Big Boo-boo… (Sniff…Sniff…L ) but with Baba’s surgery and Gauri’s hand accident, we had barely anytime to sleep. Both of my dearest ones in so much pain and I wasn’t able to do much to ease it.

Last Tuesday (May 20^th) while I was on a conf. call we got a call from the daycare, and all I knew was Mani was running around looking for his wallet and car keys. I was half listening to what he was trying to tell me. Then while rushing out of the house, I heard him say, Gauri’s fingers …. and that’s all that I heard. This was enough for me to get me anxious and nervous and I was somehow trying to end the conference cal, but you know how when you want to get out of something, you feel like you just cant!! As soon as I hung up the phone, I tried to call Mani’s cell phone, all I heard was my poor baby screaming in the background and Mani asked me to call up Pediatrician right away as he was driving to their clinic. Dare I ask how was Gauri, from all the screaming I knew she was in too much pain, but in a very timid voice I asked how bad was it - “Not good Pragati….her fingers are bleeding profusely…now call up the Dr.”. As I explained to the lady at the clinic what had happened she seemed so relaxed about this accident, advised me to keep Gauri home, wash the wound and watch if she can move her fingers. Damn, she sounded COLD!! I agree kids do have accidents and Dr.s see it all the time, but not my child – its her very first cut, very first accident, very first bleeding and she is the most important thing in the world (at least to us). So I kept insisting that we need to see a Dr. and she said only after an hour. I wasn’t happy with her answer. I tried to call back Mani and he wouldn’t pick up his phone. I kept dialing like a maniac with all the wrong thoughts running in my head – “what’s going on, why is he not picking, Is Gauri Ok, is her hand OK, are fingers still intact” (my heart pounding like it was going to come out of my body), redialing with one hand, I was trying to see who to call and ask for a ride, my car was with him….. Finally after the longest 1 hour he called back confirming she was Ok, no fractures and the Dr. did see her.

But he also told how embarrassed he felt at the Pediatrician – “embarrassed why?” As he was fighting, arguing and shouting at the reception staff who refused to have a Dr. see Gauri, trying to tell she is too much pain and “look her hand is all bleeding” and blah..blah…blah…blah… Gauri stops screaming and starts insisting on getting down on the floor to - go play with the big toy stove and refrigerator in the play area!! “Hahaha…. Poor dad – he thins his little darling is in too much pain, but guess what daddy is in more pain… sure this is their first kid…hahaha”. I am sure this is what was running in the minds of everyone witnessing this scene.

Gauri came home, she wasn’t crying but her face had turned crimson and eyes puffy from all the crying, I looked at her bandaged fingers and as Mani described to me that her nail-bed might be damaged and that has serious implications, she pulled the bandages off and there I saw - ripped-up fingers, the open wounds and nail under the skin..God, how could someone do this to my little sweet-pea, my jigar-ka-tukda (piece of my heart)…and there you go….I was crying…crying hugging her closer to me and she started crying when she didn’t now what was mumma crying…..

Her wounds are almost healed now, the nail still doesn’t look good, its coming off from its roots, we may have to see a hand surgeon to see if the nail bed is still intact and the nerves to the nail are fine. But in all this Gauri has been the bravest little kid I have ever seen. She is definitely braver and tougher then her mommy is!!

Happy Mommy's Day

2008-05-13T10:08:00.002-04:00

A very Happy Mother’s day to all the Mommy readers of this blog. Sorry we are late in posting this but we sure remembered all of you mommies on this special day. Hope you all had lots of fun with your “special-little-people”. With baba gone (work travel :o( …) Gauri and I had lots of just-my-mommy-and-me time together and loved every minute of it. OK, I did, but I am sure Gauri was missing her daddy way too much. He had to leave when she was still asleep so when she woke up she was looking for “baba” everywhere and then she pushed her toy-box to the window and started repeating “baba-aajao” (Daddy come back)!! Oh that poor thing, those words were melting my heart and I wished her daddy could come back :o(

It is amazing how quickly she is learning both Hindi and English phrases and when she speaks either one of the languages, its is so amazing that I cant express in words.

Later Gauri and I watched some videos and read some books and did I ever mention how crazy she is about her “buuks”, she needs them when she wakes up, when she eats, when she comes back from play outside, when she sleeps and now even at bath time.

Oh and I want to wish a VERY SPECIAL FIRST MOTHER’S DAY TO some very special mommies to my heart this year, my dear friends who all had babies in last one year – Tushima, Yamini, Shweta, Asma, Paridhi and my sis-in-laws Rashi and Tanu.

Hope these babies fill your lives with immense joy and love.

Lots of love to all babies and mommies,
Mommy & Gauri.

Little girls when they grow-up

2008-05-03T21:36:00.006-04:00

Still love their daddies the most and daddies never stop loving them either.

Ok, now I shouldn’t but I am writing this little post about me instead of it being about Gauri. But I was so touched by a beautiful card I received from MY daddy that I couldn’t resist sharing it with you all and specially with Gauri, so she knows that no matter how grown up she may get, but she will ALWAYS BE DADDY’S LITTLE GIRL (just like her ma is for her naanu (Grandpa) )

On this birthday, I received this most beautiful birthday card ever, it touched my heart and definitely made my day. Sometimes, due to distances, due to our very busy lives and a million other things, we forget to appreciate small things and forget to tell our loved ones how much we love and appreciate them in our lives. This card made me realize how very much my father loves me and that, I must have brought similar happiness to his life that Gauri has brought into ours. Although, all grown-up now, we sometimes almost talk to our parents like we know everything and we know what’s best for them, but honestly, wouldn’t you give up anything and everything to just be that same little girl who would sit on your daddy’s shoulders to watch a puppet show or go to nauchandi-mela (fare) and ride that giant-wheel and every other scary ride sitting besides him? - I would!!

Here’s the card that brought tears to my eyes and took me back to my cherished childhood:

For the benefit of my non-hindi speaking friends, here is the translation of the card in English, Of course it is almost the literal translation so I can’t do justice to the beautiful simily being used in hindi but I am sure you’ll get the idea.

Dear Daughter,
You are our biggest happiness.
When you came into our life,
It felt as if the moonlight just came down to light our home
Your smile has decorated every corner of our house
May your life bloom like a beautiful garden,
Our world has become beautiful just by having you.

Thank you Father,
you are simply THE BEST
and I will always love you.

Ester or Oester

2008-03-23T22:07:00.003-04:00

This morning I was curious to know about easter bunny so I could narrate the story to Gauri and this is what I found: The Easter Bunny is a mythological rabbit who brings gifts and candy to children on the Easter holiday, most likely based on pre-Christian customs honoring the fertility goddess Eostre. Humm Interesting.

Happy Easter everyone. Hope everyone had a nice time on this holiday and all the little kids lots of fun dressing up like little bunnies and going for egg hunt.

Although this is Gauri’s second Easter but this is the first one that she actually enjoyed a lot. Gauri and I decorated some fancy straws for her friends at the day care; Gauri loved to suck through hers and that actually was the reason why she drank a lot of milk on Friday – she was so fascinated by her decorated straws, it was fun watching her get exited about that. She also dressed up in all pink and was putting up quite a show in that fluffy skirt. I had thought earlier that she might find it difficult to wear the skirt and so I asked her teacher to take it off and put on another pants on her in a while. When I went to pick her up I found her still dressed in her fancy outfit and fluttering around daintily like a beautiful butterfly- I was told by her teachers that she loved all the attention she was getting because of her dress up and she just would not let them take the dress off - how funny!! Our little bunny had a lot of fun going for egg hunt although she was little apprehensive about the real bunnies she saw there. It was only at bath time that she finally let me take that skirt off. She loved the eggs she found since for once mommy wasn’t taking those away from her and they wouldn’t break into that messy yellow things that she so dislikes :o) Its always os much fun to see her happy !

Just be a Parent

2008-03-12T23:34:00.008-04:00

And I mean literally.
Well, with dad always traveling for work, it mostly leaves Gauri and I to manage everything on our own, atleast during the weekdays.
Although, we do not notice, forget appreciate, our husbands for helping us with the baby but once they are not around – we very quickly realize what the poor dads were doing in helping us with the baby.... even if it means watching the baby while watching the other baby - "TV", it still is such a big help! How on earth would we have otherwise done anything in the house.

I am still discovering about raising a child, but by far, I think, Toddler stage is probably the most difficult one. The kid is more “I”, “me”, “Myself” yet wont understand when you try to tell them something. They are exploring everything around them and there is nothing that can stop a “curious George”. "Mommy, my hands are messy"
Parenting is hard enough but trying to raise a little with out an in-home partner is undoubtedly twice the work and most challenging for both the parent as well as the child.
As a “single parent” (for lack of better word for this unique situation that working couples are in) you have to deal with everything yourself from morning rush, to fixing dinner, food for the next day, bath time, playtime, bedtime, midnight crying, shopping, driving, childcare projects, daily disciplining and teaching and everything in between. And if this is not enough, just add to this mix – a full time job!! And even if you are sick and extremely exhausted it falls on you to step up and do what’s required.
Earlier (up until recently), I was a perfectionist and I would go above and beyond my capabilities to get things right and then get so over worked with it that I would not have the energy left to fully enjoy the moment. But it only took one class project of Gauri that I had to complete in just about 15 minutes because I totally forgot about it and I was not ready to let my little girl go to the daycare without her decorated heart-cut-out. Thanks to my collection of junk I was able to complete her project and send it with her but I felt bad - bad that it was really meant to do with her and not just do it on my own; I wish I had done a better job at it but I had to stop beating myself, after all, I am only human. And soon I realized that something had to change and that I need to enjoy the experience of raising my child. So I decided on the following tips to create a healthy happy environment for myself, my husband and our child.
- Stop striving for perfection - Good-enough is enough.
- Stop trying to be a super-mom and ask for help.
- Stop worrying about other parents and other’s in general and do what best I can and be happy with that.
- Make peace with my situation and accept it.
- Be appreciative of my partner and stop being frustrated.
- And above all – be A parent and stop acting like both.

A daughter may outgrow your lap......

2008-02-18T23:13:00.007-05:00

but she will never outgrow your heart.

Remembering my mother, the woman who made me the woman I am today, who taught me everything I know, who spent countless sleepless nights worrying about me, caring for me, who put my dreams in front of every single one of hers, and expected only one thing in return - that I be a daugher who loves her.

Althought mother, you are no longer in this world, but I can feel your presence and continue to be your daughter in more profound ways. Mother, we love you and will alaways do. I just hope that I can be a good mother myself.

Gauri honey, I want you to know your Nani (mother's mother) as the most amazing woman you would have known, a woman with a heart so big, that she had place in her heart for every single person who crossed their path with hers. She was a wonderful guide a child could have the best friend a girl could ask for.

Love is in the air

2008-02-15T22:30:00.012-05:00

Hope you all had a wonderful Valentines day yesterday. Gauri and I tried to keep ourselves busy and made the best of it; missing baba so much that she was calling this other kid’s dad – baba and embarrassed me, was telling Gauri “that's not baba, baba is going to be home soon…” Poor kid, I felt sorry for her, but who can we blame? Let me think, humm… well nobody; OK on a second thought baba’s job that takes him away from us so often and just like last year – on Valentines Day also. But hey, who said you’ll always be dealt all Aces in life??

Anyway, I know I am late for wishing everyone Happy Valentines day, but better late than never. I wanted to write this post yesterday but just was too tired last night from baking and decorating the previous night. This was the first year Gauri was going to celebrate Valentines Day with her friends at daycare and I had no idea how to make it special. I had thought of making Valentines Day cookies for her to take to the day care but when I saw heart shaped cookies everywhere in the supermarkets, I didn’t feel it was worth making them at home. So I decided to make mini cupcakes. We made several different types of cupcakes (I mean in shape and decoration) some heart shaped and some same ol round. Thank God, the recipe I followed was great, they came out just perfect though some of them oozed out of the cupcake liners, but I made plenty to chuck away some.

In the morning Gauri work up early and both she and I had fun time decorating them. I had already bought plenty of things to decorate (of course I had no idea what it takes to decorate them) When it comes to baking I am the worst and I will not lie, but that evening the thought of just buying some from the super market did cross my mind, but every time I was reminded of my mom and how special we felt when she would bake us a cake for our birthday etc. Of course she was the BEST cook in the entire world and I am not exaggerating this, some of you will concur with me on this since you have had a chance to taste her cooking, everything she made was simply amazing.
Anyway, the cupcakes looked cute and when we took them to the day care, Gauri’s teachers we very appreciative. In the evening we had a note from some teachers that they were really yummy and of course there were none left in the tray. This morning someone asked me for the recipe of yesterday’s cup cakes and that felt like a true compliment. Oh did I mention they had real strawberries in them – why not, our little Boo loves strawberries. And by the way I don’t have many pictures from yesterday, will post them here soon. And the name Boo was given to Gauri yesterday by her teacher since she thought Gauri reminded her of Boo in Monster Inc.

And before I end, here’s a beautiful quote I once read somewhere:

~~~~~~"Trip over love, you can get up.~~~~~
~~~~~~Fall in love and you fall forever."~~~~

First swim in the big pool

2008-02-07T22:10:00.000-05:00

As promised in my last , here's a peak into our fun date with daddy on Gauri's 15th Month Birthday. Dad is going to be away on the valentines day, so we thought of an early celebration and it coincided with Gauri's 15th Mo. B'day also. We all had a lot of fun at the Red Door Spa, and then daddy decided to treat us to a 'slice of heaven' - the name of the famous Mystic Pizza. Now that Gauri and I are back on normal diet with no Soy or Dairy restrictions - that slice of pizza did really taste like a slice of Heaven. Gauri was extremely tired of playing in the water (and so were we) but she enjoyed some spaghetti-marinara, well at least it was fun throwing and flying it all over the table (Thanks to Super-Sunday, there was hardly anyone except us at the restaurant, oh and yes thanks to daddy for giving up his Sunday game to treat us - we love you baba) Some pictures now -

15 months old - Time flies

2008-02-04T15:20:00.000-05:00

Gauri, turned 15 months yesterday. I still cant believe where time is flying away. She is growing way too fast for her mum….. I wish I could get more of her….I wish I could capture every single moment in a box and re-live it again when she is all grown up.
Of course she is no more an infant, she is a lil kid for sure, doing everything that a 15 month old does….and more....
She has a vocabulary that consists of "Mama", “mumma”, “ma” and "Dada", “papa”, “baba”, “nana”, “buba”, “meme” plus some other words, such as “Hello” (only when she has a phone in her hand), "Turtle” (thanks to her animal book, I wonder how she learned the most difficult animal….)She is also saying "More" and a word from hindi language “dede” dede meaning “give me”. The lasted development has been that at the very sight of a dog, its picture in a book, on TV ,she would immediately say “bhu-hu”, that sounds so funny when she says that!! Last couple of days, her daily activity report card from the Day care states “Gauri has been very talkative today”
She can also follow simple commands, such as "Not that drawer – that’s daddy’s" or "Put it back" or “come here”…. “Please give mum a kiss”. She very well understands the phrase "No," but must of the time she decides to ignore. She is definitely having a lot of fun talking and of course I am having more fun watching her talk.

She days are not very active – full of running around in the house (not walking – just running), hiding behind the doors, climbing (and falling) on the step up stool, pushing things around and making sure nothing stay where mum left it. I believe she is trying to redecorate the house, why not, she has her mum’s genes lol. I cant believe where these little ones get all this energy from, oh and I remember one of the dad’s (of one of Gauri’s little friend) we meet a couple of days ago said “they don’t get it from anywhere, they just drain it from us” hahahahaha…..how true. Now I know why I am dead tired and ready to go to bed at 8 PM (Well, if I get to go down that early or not that another question).

Gauri is also very keenly observing everything I do, its funny to find her imitating my hair drying process, applying lip guard on the lips….pretty much everything. Its so hilarious when she starts doing exactly how I do something. Oh gosh, it’s a full time entertainment channel just watching this little monkey copy us. On her 15th month Birthday, we took Gauri to the Pet store to look at some of the cute animals. She loved the birds and the mouse though I am not sure what she thought of the fishes (she wasn’t much interested) her favorite though was the dog, one of the pet owners had brought in the store. I think we might have to get her a pet sometime (not sure how will we manage that during our month long vacations to India). We also took Gauri for her first swim in the big swimming pool at the Red Door Spa and she loved it. We three had a great time celebrating her 15th month Birthday.

Happy 15th month birthday honey – we love you and you make our world a fun place to be in.
Everyone, have a great week.

Ah! the Belly Button

2008-01-17T18:46:00.000-05:00

Pardon me for this post, since I am not sure if this might sound a little bit weird, specially the part where I get more detailed and visual, but I found this so amusing that I had to share it with all you ladies (and men if any).

So baba (daddy) is out again on a business trip to a much warmer place and Gauri and I stuck home in this chilly-grey-no-sun day of New England winter. Of course, Gauri is so mobile now that its IMPOSSIBLE to keep that kid indoors. She needs to move move move and I have to find new things we can do indoors to keep her entertained. So after reading all the books, watching some Tom and Jerry, I played some music on and kid started dancing. Gauri is a dancer, she always has been, since almost when she was about 8 months old. She loves music (almost every kind and to some she simply likes to clap and others she just 'bangs her head' and I – I get dizzy banging mine!

She doesn’t care much for anything on TV but if you turn on the radio or the iPOD anytime, even just as she wakes up in the morning, that little monkey immediately drops everything and starts dancing. Yes, dancing.
Well anyway, so what happened is while we both were dancing I did that funky move and bent backwards on my back and she saw my belly button (a couple of days ago). Since then every now and then she just wants to see my belly button. She laughs and giggles as soon as she get a peak at the BB – not sure why is it so funny, but it seems to entertain her immensely. Every so often she will remember it and come running to me, lifting my shirt up and getting a kick out of tickling me there.

So last light during her bath time, she suddenly discovered her belly button, and boy – how happy she was….her eyes were light by a weird shine and she was poking in it, putting lotion and everything possible in it – even trying to stick a Cheerio in it – yeap Cheerio. She was so happy she was getting hysterical. She wouldn’t stop playing with it, I had to almost hide it with her diaper and make her believe that its gone. But came morning she found it again and now she often lifts her shirt (and mine too) and points at it and laughs. Funny how that tiny little belly button caught her attention and amused her so much.

Apparently it looks like even fruits and vegetables have belly buttons LOL!!

Welcome 2008

2008-01-01T04:23:00.000-05:00

Happy New Year to all family and friends!!

No New years resolution this time, just stick to the one’s from last year (Sure you know why)!!

Just wanted to share the facts about the crystal ball that drops in Times Square. It’s the 100th anniversary of the ball drop and yes I have witnessed it one myself. Its madness I tell you to stand in queue to save the right spot for yourself, almost7 – 8 hours in advance not to mention in freezing temperatures. But well it has its own thrill and when you are there, the excitement is so high that you forget everything else.
So anyways, the crystal ball is light up on New Year’s Eve, and one minute before midnight the countdown starts, the ball begins its 77 foot descent down a poll on top of One Times Square, flashing all sorts of bright colors.

The concept is based on a time ball, an instrument used by sailors to set their chronometers, as accurate time keeping was essential for sailors so they could determine their longitude while at sea. The balls were typically dropped at 1 PM, and the time re-set was done upon the drop, not when it reached the bottom

Here’s some general info I found on the New Year’s ball, which debuted in 1907 I believe. The Ball gets an overhaul for the new millennium celebrations with a design from Waterford Crystal. It weighs 1070 pounds (485 kg), measures six feet (1.8 m) in diameter and installed with 504 crystal triangles, illuminated externally with 168 halogen light bulbs and internally with 432 light bulbs of clear, red, blue, green and yellow colors. There are strobe lights and mirrors to create bursts of excitement and special effects for the audience.

This year the ball was lit by LED lights provided by Philips instead of halogen bulbs for energy saving purpose.

Where have we been??

2008-01-01T03:36:00.000-05:00

If some of you have been wondering why there has been no activity on the blog - it was because we were in India for past 4 weeks. We have just been back to States on Saturday, but still not fully functional. Manish is down with fever and I have runny rose and body ache. Gauri is also struggling with the jet lag, just like us. Most of our bags have been unpacked yesterday, but still lots to sort and arrange. I should be done cleaning most of our closets and emptying most of the bags by this evening - ofcourse if I have the energy during the day. I do plan to post new things from our India trip very soon.

Although I had planned to update the blog while in India, but at first there was no Internet access at home , then when we finally did get high-speed Internet, I had NO time what-so-ever to do anything leisurely.

The trip started with Gauri falling severely sick on the flight. She seemed somewhat OK till Italy but on our flight from Italy to India her fever shot up to a 104 degree and would’t go down despite regular Tylenol and cold compresses. Poor thing was truly miserable and uneasy and cried all through the flight. We took turns to hold her and walk on the plane to give her some comfort from those suffocating tiny spaces on the flight but nothing helped. My heart was breaking but we had no choice but to wait 9 hours before we land.

First 8 days In India w, Gauri was constantly sick, high fever, bad cough and runny nose. She would simply cry cry cry, not want to get down and always wanted to be held and slept all day all night…..no activity at all. It was hard to believe that such an active kid like her could act this way. But I cant blame her, the fever wasn’t getting better despite heavy dose of fever reducers and antibiotics and the cough that would make you deaf. Finally my Grandfather suggested we try Homeopathic treatment for her. I was ready to anything, to help my little pumpkin so we started Homeopathic treatment and sure, she felt better right away. Although, the modern pharmaceutical sciences do not believe in Homeopathy for various controversial reasons, but I now have firm belief in that treatment, it sure did show miracles on my sick kid.

Gauri got better a few days later, but she has some weight loss and she did not eat even a grain of food the first 1 week in India. She would get sick now and then, with lose motions etc, but other than that she was a happy little person so energetic and so active that it would take her only a few sec to disappear in front of our eyes and engage in some mischief. She was darling of her entire family both Nanu’s side as well as Dadu’s and she made sure she check out everything in the house and rearrange everything in her own way and keep the grand parents on their toes J

More updates from our trip, to follow soon.

HAPPY NEW YEAR all of you.
.

First visit to a Hair Salon

2007-11-23T19:03:00.000-05:00

After Gauri’s Mundan (Hindu tradition of shaving baby’s head) last week of March, we let her hair grow all this while. I was quire hopeful that I will be able to tie pigtails on my sweet pea but I guess I was wrong. Though she had enough hair to pull them into pigtails, but our little monkey did not want to stay at one place for anything. Ofcourse ,she is a very busy girl (as they saw at her daycare) and to stand still for 30 seconds, for mum to tie her hair in a band – NO – NO…too much. I was so excited that I have a HUGE collection of hair accessories for her, which ofcourse I have hardly been able put those in her hair partly because she is so mobile and partly because she loves to take them out and put them in her mouth. So finally, I decided to get her a decent hair trim if not a real hair cut - her hair was growing ‘Wild’.

Well anyway, after several unsuccessful attempts and various appointment cancellations and visits to different hair salons, I finally found one that was especially for ‘kids’. Sure, as her dad says, I am a “perfectionist”, thought, I don’t quite agree with him because all I want is to do things “right”, though I agree that sometimes it takes way too much time for me to just “do-things-right” but there was no compromise with Gauri’s hair-cut. After-all she has (atleast that’s what I think and a lot of people who see her tell me) the most beautiful hair for a one year old and I didn’t want anyone to mess it up specially when she is just 10 days from going to India first time. This salon had excellent reviews on internet and I had myself interviewed the hair dresser who was going to cut Gauri’s hair. I know that sounds funny but I needed the assurance that they understood that she is 1 year old, can’t stay in one place for more than a minute and how I wanted her hair.

We reached the salon 15 mins late and just as we entered they did give me “the look” and made me realize I was late for my ‘Appointment’ - can you believe it – baby needs hair appointment – Gosh! What are we talking about – no spontaneity, we are talking about a baby here. Well the place was somewhat special I must say - very cute and especially for kids and the people were trained to handle kids and I did like the overall experience. Sure the prices were comparable to adult hair cuts if not more! It did cost much more for Gauri to have a hair cut than her dad…..hahahaha…. I truly find that amusing. Anyway, Gauri I was so well behaved and stood still the entire time, here eyes were glues to the Mirror where she watches the girl do stuff with her hair. Sure, she loves it when you gently strove her hair (just like her dad) and loves to watch herself in the mirror. So she had a nice easy hair cut and even gave a BIG smile for a picture with the hair dresser. I think she looks cute with this new hair cut. I love it.

To Gauri - from Daddy (special post - Daddy first Post)

2007-11-12T23:17:00.000-05:00

Happy Diwali my Love. This is your first diwali today with us and I am so happy and fortunate to celebrate it with you and your mommy. You have brought a huge change in our life, attitude and priorities, almost as if dust is cleared and we can see things clearly as to what matters in life. I think about the last 1 year of our life, your first birthday and exciting journey of planning your birthday party.
Your mommy started planning for your birthday more than 3 months ago, because we wanted to celebrate you coming into our lives with friends and family together, who have been incredibly excited about you. I know that we are lucky to have you in our life but in some sense I also believe that you are also very lucky to receive so much love from each and every person in our family and friends. Whenever you are with them, they talk about you, when they hold you, the love is oozing from their eyes, words and kisses.
We deliberated on the theme of the birthday for quite long. There was Elmo, Dora, princess Pooh etc. but we wanted to remember this year in a way that relates to you. We realized that "Strawberry" is your favorite food this year and it always give us immense pleasure to see you eat those. So what better theme than strawberry? This is how we came up with your Birthday theme.

Your Mommy created an invitation card with great love, and sent it to our friends and family. I am not sure how to thank all the people for the incredible effort of coming to the party despite not so favorable weather, and specially those who dove over 150 miles just for your birthday and others who flew 1500 miles for 2 days to be with you on this milestone.

I think the highlight of the party was the cake, if you can take one good thing from your mom then it should be persistence. She wanted a cake in a strawberry shape and that to something you can eat given that you cannot eat dairy or eggs. Long story short, after going to 5 bakers, tasting several toppings, creams, fillings etc, she finalized a vegan Strawberry flavored cake with strawberry Mousse from a custom baker. I must say that this is something that makes your mommy the incredible women she is.

Day before your birthday was really special as your mummy and I remembered this time last year, from the doctors visit, to Chinese food and how she was going through the labor and I was preparing the music to play in the delivery room from various CD to the i-pod from 10:00 PM to 5:00 AM at home before going to the hospital. How thrilled she was when she saw you for the first time and gave wonderful compliments to Dr. Simpson and the nurses Lestra and Alice on your arrival.

Day of the party started with calls from Nanu, Dadu, Bua, Mausi, Chacha and others calling to give you blessings and with Anubhav and Arvind, Abhinav mama (uncle) running around to prepare for decorating the place on the beach and getting other things ready. But the lord of rains and winds also wanted to celebrate your birthday just like janmastami and they came down with full force but it did not stop Harry chacha, Vipin Tauji, Supriya Mausi, Aarti Mausi and parents of your little friends to drive from New Jersey, Hartford and Boston etc to come and give you blessings.
You ran around in the party, danced with aunt Chantal, played with Shealyn, Brooke, Aryan, Tommy, Ethan and all the other kids and were happy the whole evening; you even clapped after cutting your own cake. Party ended with me making paan for the guests which Barry almost thought was a prank.

Day after the party was equally fun when you opened the gifts, I am almost certain that you enjoyed tearing the wrappers more than the gift and the best gift of all was the box of the telephone that you even took to bed with you that night.

This day makes me happy and sad, happy to see you grow and do new things but sad that you have grown 1 year in a blink. I do not know how can I hold on to all the memories that you have given us. Details of your smiles, cute little gestures, saying baba, papa, mum-mum and all the other things you do. Please don’t grow that fast, make the days longer, give us more time to savor each moment and better memory to hold on to all the things and bigger heart to keep all the love you have given us.

I love you my love.... yours baba (daddy)

You are 1 already!! Happy 1st Birthday

2007-11-05T21:49:00.000-05:00

At 12:11 PM on Nov 3rd 2007, honey, you turned 1!!

Congratulations on completing one year of milestones and developmental achievements. Happy 1st Birthday my sweet-pea. You have filled our lives with immense happiness and new surprises. You bring sunshine to a cloudy day, your beautiful memories keep us warm on a cold winter day and your smile gives a cool sensation to a hot summer day. Honey you definitely complete us and though its your Birthday – we feel like we have been blessed with the most precious present!! Love and lots and lots of love for you always.

Baby we celebrate your first birthday,

with one candle on your cake;

we the proud parents stare in wonder

At each new move you make.
Friends and family join in celebration,

As this special date arrives,

For baby your have brought pleasureInto all our lives.

We look forward now to seeing

How you become and toddler and grow,

From the cute and tiny infant that you were one year ago.
So dig into your strawberry cake icing;

and enjoy your presents, too.

The reason for this day is a special person -you!

Baby Steps

2007-10-09T22:26:00.000-04:00

Last one year has been the most amazing years of our lives (me and my husband). Watching Gauri do new things every day, has been the most satisfying and most precious part of our life for last 11 months. But when it comes to milestone, her first steps can’t be beaten. She has been standing unsupported for almost a month and a half now and cruising around like nobody’s business. Her new found mobility has not only amazed us but has also kept us on our toes. She is always on the go, one second she is there and the very next second, gone….

One day she started standing against the couch, then came cruising holding furniture etc. — and last Saturday (Oct. 6th) she woke up, and as I put her down on the floor, she came tottering back into our waiting arms. We had been encouraging her to come to us walking instead of crawling for a while now, but that morning she just surprised us and then there was no stopping, she kept running doing her penguin walk back and forth between ‘mumum’ and ‘dad-dad’. Looking at her running around brought tears to my eyes, thinking, off she goes running and leaving babyhood behind. After all, her first baby steps is the first major move toward independence!

Welcome to my arms baby! You know, now, you can always run into my arms whenever you wanna feel warm, and I promise I will always be waiting for you with open arms.

Making all sorts of sounds

2007-09-20T21:57:00.000-04:00

One Sunny Afternoon

2007-09-10T13:46:00.000-04:00

Gauri is now a 10 month old and loves the outdoors. One sunny afternoon we took her out for a walk and the beautiful breeze started blowing her silky tresses away from her face and eyes. And as the sun rays kissed her cheeks, my little darling looked like a sweet little angel and I could stop myself from capturing some of those cute looks.

Moments like these take my breath away and I begin to wonder -
is there anything more fulfilling than this, more special than being
a mom to a special little person more fortunate than being blessed
with this adorable little angel in our lives.

We love you Gauri, and thanks for filling our life with immense happiness
and the bliss we couln't have experienced if it weren't for you!

Let's shake it

2007-09-05T15:15:00.000-04:00

What a performer you are my little Gauri…. Of all the toys that we get for you, you chose to have most fun with (or should I say inside) a cardboard box.
Your favorite toys aren’t any of those LeapFrog learning toys, or the rattles or those stuffed animals instead you find most fun with pots and pans and spoons and spatulas and the Tupperware!!
Here’s a sample of what you do these days…

Gauri's Latest Adveture

2007-08-01T12:57:00.001-04:00

Look what Gauri is upto these days. The new found mobility for Gauri has been a lot of fun for her and definitely a lot of close watch for "mum-mum"(her version of Mom)

My little mermaid

2007-07-19T16:48:00.000-04:00

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Being a Mom means:

2007-06-01T12:54:00.000-04:00

No more sleeping in on weekends, no more spontaneous vacations.
That every plane crash, every house fire will haunt your heart.
That the pictures of starving children will make you cry in a room full of people.
That the local news of abducted/ missing child or a gun-fire in the loacl school was never so important to you.
That your manicured nails and sophistication will be reduced to - you being a primitive animal protecting your cub.
That a sudden cry from your baby will cause you to drop your most expensive crystal without a moment's hesitation That while going into an important business meeting you will think of your baby's sweet smell and will have to use every ounce of self-discipline to keep from running home.
That however smart you may be at the office, you will second-guess yourself constantly as a mother.
That you will not think of accomplishing your own dreams, but watch your child accomplish hers.
That caesarian scar or shiny stretch marks will become badges of honor.
That the physical wounds of child bearing will heal, but becoming a mother will leave you with an emotional wound so raw that you will forever be vulnerable.
That your relationship with your husband will change forever and you will suddenly love him for reasons you would have found so unromantic.
That you would admire your husband not for being strong but for being so gentle with your baby, for never hesitating to play with his child.
That you will fall in the exhilaration of seeing your child say the first words, the first laugh, the first touch of her bare skin.

That the joy of motherhood is so real, it actually hurts and the decision you'll never regret.

Here’s something I want you to know mom:
“There isn’t a day of my life that you are not special to me mom. After being a mom myself I have much more appreciation for what you did for me and I would be happy if I could be half as good a mother as you were to me. I am, who I am today, all because of mother like you. Love you mom dearly!”

Bald and Beautiful

2007-05-10T15:22:00.000-04:00

I am very late in posting this one, Gauri has already grown a lot of hair by now, but I think its still worth sharing, how cute she looked with 'No' Hair.
On March 25, 2007, we shaved Gauri's head, which is called 'Mundan' in Indian cultures. I know it sounds so sad to shave baby's head and ofcourse I had shead tons of tears just before doing this to her; I tried every possible reasoning to avoid it, but then once done, I kinda liked her new 'baldy-baby' look - Truely BALD AND BEAUTIFUL. I hope when she grows up she also feels the same way - that she still looked absolutely adorable without any hair.

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I am happy if she is happy

2007-04-24T10:16:00.000-04:00

Although it breaks my heart to send my little sweet-pea to a day care and I must have shed tons of tears the first week I left her at the day care but finally I can see she like it.
Thank goodness she doesn't cry much at all; but she is almost confused to see other babies cry at times. I wonder what goes on in her little head??

She is only 5 months but she is already trying to sit up and mind you all by herself! She hates the bouncy seat, thinks its so dumb to lie in it. She loves the exersaucers and the jumperoo and they say at the day care - "she is very independent, even holds her own bottle"- Little miss independent.

Every time I hear she didn't feed well - I get tears; I call to check on her and hear her fussing in the background - tears again; every time I pick her up and I if I see tear marks around her eyes - feel sad again. But now after a few weeks of going to the day care, it seems like she is doing well there. She smiles at the babies when I take her in every morning, I have even caught her laughing in the evening at her pick-up time. And this morning I watched her share a toy with an older baby while they were sitting on a play mat of course supported by a pillow.
I am happy to see her happy - I'll miss her like every other day, but in my heart, I know, she is playing and she is happy.
A small photo story of a typical morning at the day care:

We love little Bunniezz

2007-04-09T15:24:00.000-04:00

I love Easter, specially, because it falls around that time of the year, when we all are ready for the change – Change from cold and grey winter to warmer and colorful spring. Smell of new leaves, the flowers and sunny days just makes you wanna get up in the morning and open your window and talk a deep breath and smile because warm days are just around the corner. And then in this beautiful weather, watching little babies dress up in pink and other bunny outfits – awesome.

But I have always wondered about the significance of the eggs and the bunnies on Easter. This is what I found:
The name Easter owes its origin from Eastre, the Anglo-Saxon goddess who symbolizes hare and egg. Eggs are a symbol of the new life that returns to nature at Easter Time. The custom of exchanging eggs came from Egyptians and the Persians. They exchanged eggs decorated in Spring colors, believing that Earth hatched from an egg which contributed to this custom.
Easter Bunny's visit is based upon a German Legend. The legend goes that a poor woman decorated eggs for her children to find during a famine. At the moment they found them, they looked up to see a big bunny hopping away. There still might be some other tales related to this, but I found this was quite interesting.

So here’s little Gauri with her bunny ears on :o) Happy easter to you all.

LOL - Laugh Out Loud

2007-02-26T15:43:00.000-05:00

This past saturday (Feb 24 of 07) we all were in the kitchen, everyone was busy with their own things, I was sweeping the kitchen floor (regular Saturday morning ritual). So yes, while I was busy with my work, I heard a loud laugh, and if everyone was in the Kitchen, then who was laughing in the living room ?? Yeap – that was Gauri’s first real laugh as she was watching baby Einstein. I ran to catch her laughing, she looked at me and laughed again. It was funny and so darn cute. I immediately picked up my camera and captured that amazing laugh with my camera. And as she laughed her eyes almost closed, it was so funny to watch her laugh like that, it was one of the purest forms of happiness, so rewarding! And once I knew she could laugh I tickled her, danced around - making funny faces to get just “one-more” laugh but she didn’t seem to do it again.

She just looked at me in amazement as if thinking - "what's wrong with you mom - why are you making all these weird sounds and standing on your head", until I made a funny fake-laugh myself and there – she laughed again.

My God - that was the most precious moment - and once again I told to myself – It's worth all the morning sickness, back aches, baby weight, stretch-marks, sleepless nights and many more troubles that come bundled with motherhood!
To all the moms out there – NEVER forget to pat yourself for the great job you are doing and if (?) it ever gets tough – look into your little one’s eyes and I can assure you - you’ll feel a special smile JUST FOR YOU.

I love you Gauri!

Oops I cut her hair REAL real short

2007-02-22T10:29:00.000-05:00

Monday evening, before her bed-time-bath, we decided to trim Gauri's hair so they don't cover her eyes anymore. Now, I have to admit that I am VERY attached to her soft black tresses; so it was hard for me to even agree on giving her wildly-growing-hair a trim. But I thought its better for her; at least her vision won't be obstructed by her hair. So, just after her massage, with Gauri in Mani's arms, very carefully, making sure not to even accidentally hurt her with those sharp tools (scissors) I made a first cut on her front bangs - only to realise I took way too much length off :o(

Then I had to even out all hair that fall on her face to same length and you should have seenat my face when I saw how much hair I took off from my baby's head.... my face completely flushed and I was almost..... OK we wont go there..... only thing I can say is - I was very emotional. Can't believe how attached I have gotten to this little "sweatpea".
Here's how she looks with short-short hair.

Gauri Learns to make different sounds

2007-02-17T16:18:00.001-05:00

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The Daffodils

2007-02-08T23:03:00.000-05:00

After another long hectic work day, when I returned home this evening, exhausted and tired, little did I know that one look at my little munchkin this evening is going to put a big smile on my face and compel me to take out my camera immediately.
And as I was downloading these pictures I was reminded of that famous poem by Williams Wordsworth - "The Daffodils". Look at these pictures and you'll know why.

THE POEM

I wandered lonely as a cloud That floats on high o'er vales and hills,When all at once I saw a crowd,A host of golden daffodils;Beside the lake, beneath the trees Fluttering and dancing in the breeze.

Continuous as the stars that shine And twinkle on the milky way,They stretched in never - ending line Along the margin of a bay;Ten thousand saw I at a glance,Tossing their heads in sprightly dance. I gazed - and gazed - but little thought What wealth the show to me had brought;

For often when on my couch I lie In vacant or in pensive mood, They flash upon that inward eye Which is the bliss of solitude;And then my heart with pleasure fills,And dances with the daffodils.

I have always liked the poem so much and ofcourse the daffodils too, but I love my little Daffodil the most.

Just experimenting

2007-02-01T18:51:00.000-05:00

Baby Gauri Pictures

2007-01-31T23:10:00.001-05:00

Baby Gauri

Baby Shower pictures

2007-01-29T14:46:00.000-05:00

Baby Shower pictures

My American Baby Shower

2006-11-29T07:15:00.000-05:00

On Oct-21-2006, a couple of friends got together to throw me and the baby an incredible baby shower. Thanks to Pam, Chantal, Jane and Manish for an unforgettable afternoon filled with love, laughter and friends. I couldnt have asked for anything more - Wishes, Blessings and company of people I Love. Thanks to all the guests for spending that afternoon with us and making it a special day for us.

I dreamt of you

2006-10-01T01:38:00.000-04:00

The world of dreams can sometimes be so real, so vivid, so pleasant that you wish you could start the it all over again, once more. Through dreams, you enter into a mysterious and fascinating world where the rules of reality do not apply.
They say that pregnant women dream of weird things like their water broke in a busy place, or that they had to rush to the hospital when they were still far from their dues date and many more scarier ones.

I generally do not dream much, at least I don’t remember them, even if I do dream, but this one I remember so clearly, so vividly and so fondly.
I saw you my little ‘sweet-pea”, standing at the top of the stair case holding the wooden siding with one hand and in the other arm holding a light brown teddy. I remember, you were in your night PJs and a T-shirt both of which had – small teddy bear print all over. I close my eyes but I can’t paint your face, but I can see the expressions on your face…. You had a funny face as it just woke up from your sleep and not finding us near you, you came out of bed, with a complaining face… You look so adorable, so innocent and so so very cute that I feel like reaching out and touching your cute little face. And yes daddy and I are standing at the bottom of the stairs, just watching you in amazement in absolute awe!

I have never seen something, someone so cute, so adorable, so innocent, so Charming and Breathtaking. I close my eyes and wish for the dream to continue…….

Baby Shower - to have or not to have !!!!

2006-09-21T14:59:00.000-04:00

In every culture pregnancy and child birth is a very happy and sacred phase not only in a woman's life but also for the family. Traditionally, in Indian culture, pregnant woman is considered very sacred and her well being is taken care by all family, relatives and friends. According to Vedic scriptures 7th month is very special because most of the fetal development has taken place by now. So, in the seventh month a special celebration is organized by the women in the family. All women gather around the mom-to-be and say prayers asking that all will be well with the mom-to-be. Its also a time for fun and pranks. Men are usually kept out and that add to their curiosity - to know what these women are doing afterall.

I am now 8 weeks from my due date and ideally I should have had the 7th celebration by now, and as a matter of fact I did. But since we live here in the States, so far away from home, we didn't celebrate in the traditional way. One Sunday morning on advice of my MIL, I woke up early, bathed and dressed up in new clothes, wore all my jewelry, and headed down to my kitchen to prepare some food and sweets for my 7th months puja (celebration). I made a few dishes, all that I could in this physical state, and my husband I did some puja and asked the gods for their blessings for out baby to be. We then called up all elders of our family to receive their blessings too. I did the virtual charan-sparsh - ah the boons of inetrnet age!
It felt a bit weird at that time and I have to admit I did miss being surrounded by my family at that time, what saddened me most was it was my first pregnancy and I was doing this for myself and there was no big celebration. But I was happy from injust juts to know that my baby-to-be was being blessed by so many wonderful family members and the Gods.

So that was one side of the story. But it would be unfair to complain anything about this situation because when you are loved, it come to you in different forms, through different people. Just like 2 days ago I received a call from a good friend and co-worker insisting that I agree to let her throw me a baby-shower. I was so over-whelmed with her offer that I didn't know what to say. She spent the precious evening time that she would have rather spent talking to her husband after a long work day, or having a nice relaxing dinner, instead, trying to convince me to let her and a couple of other friends (whose names she refused to disclose) organize a baby shower for me and the baby .I was moved and deeply touched by this very kind gesture. I cant thank God enough for surrounding me with such wonderful people in this distant land.

So yes I have yet to decide if I am willing to let them throw me a baby showe. I know my friends are waiting for my response, I just haven't figured it out if I will be comfortable with this idea and most importantly, the idea of a registry. Now that's a whole new topic - "Gift Registry", and being from the background that I am from, its not something I can digest and and adopt to most naturally!

A Letter to our baby

2006-09-11T13:45:00.000-04:00

This is my first Blog post and I am writing this in my third trimester (exactly 9 weeks before our baby's due date), waiting anxiously to meet this little one that has been moving around day-in and day-out inside me, reminding me every moment that I am not alone any moment now and that "its' with me always.... :-) What a lovely feeling it is to be expecting a child, I didnt realise it untill we were blessed to be parents. So here's my attempt to express our anticipation of this new life, in the form of a poem: ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Like a warm embrace of sweet summer breeze, I feel you everyday.
Tossing and turning you flutter inside me each passing day.

You started your journey as a tiny seed of hope that grew each day.
Now you and I share a special bond that's unique in its own way.

I stop and cherish your every move each and every day,
Your Dad and I are anxious because we know you are on your way.

We wait so patiently to see your loving face,
For we know, it will be filled with wonderful loving grace.

You are the biggest miracle sent to us from heaven above,
Just know, we will be there to care for you and to love.

I thank the Lord for giving you to me,
for choosing us as your Mommy and Daddy to be.

I dream and imagine, what a bundle of joy you would be
and for now I just call you - my little "sweet-pea".

O' my sweet baby, my sugar pie, we want you to know,
You filled our blue sky with a beautiful rainbow!

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~